Male age 32...I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for the past three years. Before we met, she had a relationship with someone else and was physically involved with him. Later, that person left her and married someone else. She is a genuinely caring, loving, and supportive person, and she wants to marry me. The problem is not her behavior or character today, but my own inability to fully come to terms with her past. Even though I myself have had physical relationships with eight women before, I often find myself disturbed by thoughts and mental images of her previous relationship. These intrusive thoughts make me anxious and emotionally unsettled. I do care about her and I am seriously considering marriage, but I sometimes worry that if I cannot overcome these feelings, I may end up making her life difficult after marriage because of my unresolved issues regarding her past. I want to make a fair and responsible decision, both for myself and for her future.
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💬 Comments (66)
Please don't marry anyone. Because if u get a girl with a past you'll feel disturbed and if u get a girl with no past it means she got a damaged or 8th hand product...
You should be concerned about your own past as you are involved with a lot of women.. What if she found about your past and feels the same way... Pretty sure she doesn't know about your past other wise she wouldn't marry you either
So you are basically looking a girl with 8 body count? To match you?
Talk it out.. i believe you have disclosed your past to her? If not, do it. Sometimes what you find disturbing in others is your own shadow projection. Have a honest conversation. Listen compassionately. Reassure each other. Take help of a counsellor if required.
I would suggest you seek psychological counselling. I am sure it can be resolved. Wish you a happy married life in advance
Both of us are Cheated.. Now the new Variety is going to Taste for that Drama.. 😂🤣😅
If I were a man and were to marry a girl today, I would consider if she has trust, respect and love for me today. Decisions should not be made based on the past nor can they be made based on the future. What people do in the past before they meet someone is a matter of the past, some people choose to talk about it with their partners, while some even don't. One of my friends married a divorced woman who didn't consummate her first marriage as her husband was gay and someone married a girl who was never married, but had an abortion in the past. I don't understand why men get worked up with the physical past, while emotional baggage from the past can be more damaging. How about people that marry their high school virgin sweethearts, in their early 20s, only to end up having affairs in their 30s or 40s? There are multiple possibilities. What really matters is the compatibility, trust understanding and respect. Marriage, at the end of the day is good friendship, everything else fizzles out over a period of time.
Do not Marry or you'll make the other person lifes difficult since you cannot come to term with her past .
You had a physical relationship with eight women? Wahh what a great work.. better consult psychiatrist
Being a Muslim, we believe in Qur'an In Qur'an Allah says ... "Wicked women are for wicked men, and wicked men are for wicked women. And virtuous women are for virtuous men, and virtuous men are for virtuous women. The virtuous are innocent of what the wicked say. They will have forgiveness and an honourable provision" ... Qur'an (Surah Al Noor - Chapter 24 Verse 26) Your story is a perfect example and fits in this verse ... Let's move on with your own Karma and don't make it complicated as you are not capable of thinking about her past, when your own past is weird ....
Let me guess, before meeting your gf, you would have always wanted to marry a virgin girl, right? Why dont you join the club too....aapke jaise bohot hain..... Itni hi problem hai to chhor do usko please! I believe breaking up now will be far more better for her than tolerating your double standards if you married her coz u care about her and she is genuinly nice!! Please do her a favour and call it quits!!
8? flexing here or fake story huh
Feeling sad for your future wife🥀
Its not your business. It's her past. U also had past that too with 8 women. It was not her fault. Her ex cheated on her. But dont marry her. This thing is gonna ruin ur marriage. Better to be friends only.
You were physically involved with her too, right? Was she your ninth? Now you’re just trying to justify the breakup after using her.
Thats why they say “you should marry you own gf otherwise you have to marry someone elses gf”
You should start with a medical checkup on yourself 😋
Brother u both had past , when u think so . She too can think about you . Be fair
A virgin woman should always find a virgin man . A woman who was in a serious relationship and has a low body count should find someone with a similar experience. A man who has previous experience wanting to marry a virgin is hypocrisy. And Past matters for both genders otherwise STD followed by cheating in marriage.
Eight body count ke baad mariage ki kya zarurat?! Bina matlab Naya tension, when you know about women, definitely you must hv a v low opinion about them & their character allready (as u hv misused or seen too much of it), Continue your escapades and predatory'ness, increasing your catch and yield.....what kind of new problem you are trying to resolve , when this kinds of mariages - and commitments, purity, respect - are not made for your types.....understand your type and never try to jump back the fence to the other (mariage) world... Actually the problem is you can only think what you are, so naturally you are thinking about loose character in the other person, which most likely doesn't even exist.. When you have lived with so much freedom, in a large ocean, what's this sea creature trying to think and mould yourself into fitting in a pond called mariage?😳
8 women...... ????? நீ தா டா பெரிய அய்டகாரன். நீ அந்த பொண்ண குறை சொல்றியா.....? உனக்கெல்லாம் உன் காதலி அல்லது பொண்டாட்டி உத்தம பத்தினியா இருக்கனும். ஆனால் நீ ஊர்ல இருக்குற பல பொன்னுட்டயும் போயிட்டு வருவ. இல்லையா.......? அசிங்கமா இல்லையா....?
You need STD tests not marriage.
Her past isn’t your business her present and future only is. Better call it off if this is an issue for you. Don’t marry and spoil her life please. You shouldn’t have dated her this long if this was the case. It’s your problem to deal with not hers. Better find a virgin (good luck with that though) to marry and make sure she doesn’t have any issue with your past too.
Talk about hypocrisy 😂 But yeah talk to a therapist he might help you.
"You may end up making her life difficult." This sums up your mindset. Don't marry her and ruin two lives. Part your ways and keep looking for the virgin girl, notwithstanding the fact that your body count will be 9 by that time.
You need professional counselling and then marry someone else. Leave her alone pls. She deserves better.
Double standard men
We are not able to understand ur current problem.
Toss a coin n see the result 🤔
Sau chuhe kaake bili haj ko chali
These thoughts & feelings can become worse after marriage. So if it's triggering you badly you better move on .
You both are made for each other 🌚
Please do an HIV test first then let's discuss your marriage in another confession.
Men in women dominated field
Recycled plastic articles don't perform properly....applies to both
unnaku lam ponnu kadachathe perusu ithula kora veraiya...better stay single all ur life dont spoil any other girls life
Yes, you want a girl to be pure like Mata Sita while you're a Ravana yourself. 😍 Haaye Raam 🙏🏻
Check HIV test immediately
Bharath Kumar Cherry
Better leave her alone,if you still look into her past,however your past was also not holy. So if her past is going to haunt, you need forget her in common intrest🙏🏼
Neither marry her nor marry anyone else simply bcoz u r a double standard person.
U r like me.
N.B.: This post is written by a frustrated woman who cannot tolerate man or else it has been written by a "hootiya," who has got nothing better to do in his life.
Leave her alone.
Ravan wants seeta wow.. Amazing dear..😀😀
Please don't marry
Stupid fellow
Dont marry anyone specially her, coz u gonna ruin her life for sure.
Don't marry if you're unable to accept her past, all this loving, caring, horse sh!t will go down the drain once she doesn't get her agenda fulfilled. See any relationship is simply a give and take one with mutual respect no one does anything for anyone for free, I repeat NO ONE. So if you're unable to come to terms with her past then eventually you'll get annoyed about giving your 100% efforts. Initially it'll be flower and peaces, but eventually it'll happen then you'll end up in a messed up situation. So advise is moving away.
Bury your head in shame🤦🏻♀️
Go get yourself checked for STDs/ HIV-AIDS then go visit a psychiatrist after that
U seriously need a doctor
Soon you will divorce
You need therapy for addiction
Oh my god. You are keeping her hanging like this while being in a relationship with her? What a hypocrite. When you played around with those 8 girls, that time you didn't think about what their husbands would think? It struck you now only when you are pretending to be serious with this gf?
What a hypocrite… what happens to the lives of the 8 girls man?
Correction: you are not a man and also you are just a toddler.people like these should he abused and bullied to death
I feel you are Male version of pro####You have 8 relationship and now you are judging someone.... only should matter is Is she loyal to you loving and caring nothing else
You can not escape KARMA.Just because you are not virgin you yourself got a non-virgin girl.
1:8 and you are still unable to accept the fact that you gf is not a v**gin? Please don't marry her and make her life miserable.
Expecting a virgin while having a body count of 8 is next level delusion 🤣 Apply that same standard to yourself and marry accordingly.
You are a hypocrite… don’t marry her and ruin her life
You are plain jealous. If your past isn't great then why are you jealous about her past?
Hypocrisy!!!!
Leave her !