Education Confessions

M40 CTC- 14 LPA. I am working in IT india's largest IT firm(i hope you understood). I have a spent all my life in single company and now in position where no growth and strugglling to survive in personal and financial life due to low package and losses in stock market.Having 2 kids and struggling for their school fees also. Not have enough tech skill to switch. Just wondering how will be my future.sometimes I get bad thoughts.Suggest what should I do.

35F Few years ago, while I was still a doctoral student, during one of the international conference I connected with a top FAANG leader. I used to post about my research in Linkedin and he later reached out to me to work for him. Interview process was very detailed and they explained how I can add value to their team. I joined with a very good package. After joining I was pushed to a different project with a new team which I had no previous experience about, yet I delivered my best and made the project a success. So fastforward 3 years, I had a very complicated pregnancy, the FAANG leader who hired me helped me work completely from home during the later months. I worked till the last day before my delivery with the same diligence as before. I gave birth to a healthy baby but my health detoriated because of post c-section complications. It compelled me to resign the job as they were not allowing any more WFH for me. Just as I was going through the resignation, the same FAANG leader reached out to me to work for him for his startup. Since I had no offers at hand, and was desperately looking for jobs, I thought lets just give it a try. Note that the startup was just an idea for him at that time and I along with few others formalized that idea and built the working model. There was no paperwork, no salary, no legal binding yet. Just a NDA was signed. I kept on checking with him about registering the company and what would be the cap table for each of us, and that I would like to draw a salary, he kept on postponing saying everyone is making sacrifices. Mind you this FAANG leader actually never left his job, he moved to a better role after starting this side- project startup with us, when questioned, he says he will lead the GTM and his role allows him to meet influencial VCs and potential customers, but he becomes angry if any of us, talks about looking for a side-role to make our ends meet. So this kept on going, its over a year now, company registration has just started but no cap table, so legal document has been drafted or shared to us. He alone will become the director. No salary, but we are pushing ourselves to complete the full work. So after a year I told him that I am in a bad financial condition and need to have some kind of earning and he bashed out at me saying you should not be in these meetings if you donot want to work with us, and added all those legal jargons that I can sue you if you talk about our work to other companies, and I can blacklist you. He even said its because of me you got the job before, etc etc. I have mentioned about facing financial difficulties before too, he just stalls it everytime saying later you will get what you deserve. Now I am torn as to what to do. I do want to develop and work for this startup because the idea is very unique, but at the same time there are too many things which are not sitting right. No compensation, no legal binding, nothing. The team is working only because of his word and his worth in the tech world. I am scared of what to do now. We do have a friendly customer who has agreed for a POC, and if this goes right we ‘may’ have other partners too, but thats all in the future which has no guarantee. He doesnot want to introduce our startup to VCs now because he says they will come and micromanage us. He said he will bear the expenses for any infra and setup related costs. The other team mates all have their own fulltime jobs and working on this startup as parttime. But for me, he says he wants me fulltime else i may leave. I donot have any other offers at hand now, I am only starting to seach but its a tuff market situation now. He has promised on get me on the company payroll once the first POC is successful and get some money for the next POC which can be anytime between the next 3-12 months. He only asked me to wait patiently. I donot know what to do now? Should I just continue to work, without a payment and wait for him to include me in the payroll after the customer comes while I develop his entire system? Or quit it straight forward and begin seriously searching for a new job. Help. Suggestions on how these things work in startups generally.

28M here. I never thought I'd write something like this, but I guess some things become too heavy to carry alone. My story started when I was in 11th standard and she was in 8th. I got to know her through a friend. We studied in different schools and lived in different places, so our relationship grew through phone calls and text messages. Back then, we had a recharge plan that allowed only 75 messages a day. Somehow, we managed to use every one of them. We shared everything—our days, dreams, fears, and slowly became part of each other's lives. For a while, family issues forced us to lose contact. I thought that chapter had ended. Then she joined college, reached out again, and we picked up right where we left off. We eventually met for the first time when she was staying in a hostel. She had only two hours of outing permission, and we spent those two hours at a cake and ice cream shop. It may sound insignificant, but to me it felt like years of conversations had finally found a face. Time passed. I completed college, got placed in Chennai, and we grew closer. We travelled together, spent more time together, and I genuinely believed we were building a future. I trusted her completely. I came from a modest background and knew what it felt like to have dreams that seemed out of reach. Since I couldn't achieve some of the opportunities I wanted, I wanted her to have them instead. I supported her education, helped financially whenever I could, and genuinely wanted her to succeed. For years, I believed what we had was real. Then during her postgraduate studies, I found out she was involved with other guys. My world collapsed. The strange thing is that even after learning the truth, I still wanted her. I've always been a one-woman man. From the moment I loved her, I imagined spending my life with her. What hurt most was that while I was pleading with her not to leave, she was pleading with someone else to come back. I'm not saying this to portray her as a bad person. Life is rarely that simple. But that was my reality. Eventually, she told me she didn't want me anymore. That period broke me. I went through panic attacks, lost focus, and struggled to function normally. The days passed without her presence, but never without her memories. To survive, I focused on myself. I worked harder than ever. One of the proudest moments of my life was buying my first car. Growing up, there were times when even owning a bicycle felt impossible. By God's grace, life had changed. Ironically, around that time, she came back. She said she had made a mistake and wanted me in her life again. Logic told me not to go back. My heart didn't listen. So I gave us another chance. Years passed. What started as a school-time connection had now stretched across more than a decade. Whenever I asked whether she had lost interest, I always gave her the option to leave. Every time, she assured me she wanted me. Yet the same patterns continued. I eventually discovered she was cheating again. The pain wasn't just about what she did. It was realizing that even after knowing her best and worst sides, I still couldn't stop loving her. When I confronted her, she disappeared from my life once again. And now, here I am. Alone. I know I'll probably never see her again. Never hear her voice again. For years, we shared every detail of our lives. She wasn't just someone I loved—she became part of who I was. It's been more than a year, but I still don't want to forget her. I still find myself checking her profile more often than I should. Not because I expect a message. In fact, a part of me hopes she never comes back. Because if she did, I'd have to fight the same battle between my heart and my mind all over again. I don't think she was an evil person. In many ways, she was one of the most beautiful souls I knew. That's what makes everything so confusing. The person who gave me some of my happiest memories also gave me some of my deepest wounds. Despite everything, I genuinely want her to be happy. And if there is such a thing as another life, I hope we meet under different circumstances—without the confusion, the hurt, or the bad timing. Maybe then our story would have a different ending. Today, I have a decent life. My family is proud of me. They're looking for marriage alliances because they're worried I'll spend my life alone. If I'm being honest, that fear lives inside me too. I don't know whether I'm holding on to love, memories, or simply a future I imagined but never had. All I know is that after all these years, I'm still trying to find my way forward. Sorry for the long post. I used to skip lengthy confessions and wonder who had the patience to read them. Turns out everyone's story looks long until it's your turn to tell your own. If you've read this far, thank you. You've probably spent more time reading about my relationship than the person in it spent choosing me.

I am a 39-year-old woman with two children — an 11-year-old daughter and a 6-month-old baby boy. My life has been full of ups and downs, and I often feel many of my struggles are the result of my own impulsive emotional decisions. Sometimes I feel I have spoiled my own life in ways I never imagined. My husband and I had a love marriage in 2012, though we knew each other since 2008. We came from middle-class families and, being middle children, carried responsibilities for both sides of the family. Financially, we supported many relatives — my husband’s siblings and my own family as well. I spent most of my salary helping others, taking loans for my siblings’ education and marriage, and supporting family needs. Today, I have almost no savings, no jewelry of my own, and most of my salary goes toward loans. Despite giving so much, I often felt emotionally neglected, unseen, and unappreciated — both in my in-laws’ family and my own. During family gatherings, I felt cornered and lonely. Deep inside, I craved love, attention, emotional connection, and respect. In 2019, my life changed when I became emotionally attached to a colleague. Over time, the attachment became very strong. I even told him I would divorce my husband so we could marry, but he refused because he feared social judgment and damaging his reputation. Despite trying to end the relationship several times, we could not separate emotionally. Eventually, he got married due to family and societal pressure. I was heartbroken and even tried to stop the marriage, but later accepted it. After only a few months, his marriage fell apart due to personal issues between them. During that time, he chose me and wanted a future together. I even moved into a rented flat away from my husband and family to gain clarity, but eventually returned because I could not stay away from my daughter. In April 2023, I confessed my affair to my husband. He was deeply hurt but never cruel to me. We started divorce proceedings and even attended our first court hearing in tears. Yet he told me to choose the life that would make me happy. Later, we paused the divorce and continued living together. My husband remained calm and supportive, but I failed to fully end contact with my boyfriend, who was still waiting for clarity about our future. In 2025, I found out I was pregnant with my boyfriend’s child. I was devastated and terrified. I discovered the pregnancy after 10 weeks and felt emotionally broken. I did not want to terminate the pregnancy, but I was equally afraid of society, my husband, and the consequences. My boyfriend wanted to keep the baby and emotionally supported me. Since I still had no clarity about marriage or my future, we decided he would raise the baby after birth. For nearly seven months, I hid my pregnancy while living with my in-laws. I dealt with sickness, emotional pain, fear, and loneliness completely alone. Even my mother did not know. Later, I moved away claiming work reasons and stayed with my boyfriend during the final months of pregnancy. I gave birth to a baby boy and cared for him for two months before returning. Leaving him behind was emotionally devastating, but I believed I was following what had already been decided. After returning home, I told my husband the truth again. He was heartbroken, yet once again asked me to choose the life that would truly make me happy. The problem is that I am not happy. When I am with my husband and daughter, I deeply miss my boyfriend and baby boy. When I am with my boyfriend and son, I feel guilt and miss my husband and daughter. My daughter chose to stay with her father, which completely broke me. I wanted both my children to grow up together with me, but life seems to have taken another path. My husband still hopes we can rebuild our marriage, while my boyfriend wants us to build a life together for the sake of our son and stability. I feel emotionally torn, confused, guilty, and unable to decide where I truly belong or what life would bring peace to everyone involved. Sometimes, I feel so overwhelmed by the consequences of my choices that I want to run away from everything. I am not looking for sympathy or criticism of anyone involved. I know mistakes were made, including by me. I am only trying to understand what the right path forward is — for myself, my daughter, my son, and everyone connected to this situation. I would truly appreciate respectful and honest thoughts.

I really don't know what to do, and I need some advice. First, an important detail: I'm not from India, although I am South Asian. He is Indian. He is currently in my country for work and will be leaving soon(probably after a few months) Leaving aside how our love story started, the main thing I want to talk about is our future. I am 20 years old and currently in my first year of MBBS, so I still have many years of study ahead of me. He is 25 years old. I cannot disclose his identity, but I can say that we love each other very much. The problem is that both of us know that our future together seems uncertain. Recently, his parents have been pressuring him to get married. Since his job often keeps him away from home, they want him to marry someone who can stay with them and take care of them as they grow older. He tells me that he does not want to get married right now, but he feels that he may have to give in to his parents' wishes. This is especially difficult for me because he is my first love. He has shown me genuine love and care from the very beginning, and I have never had any reason to doubt his feelings. I genuinely cannot imagine my life without him. At the same time, I cannot marry him right now even if I wanted to, because I need to focus on completing my medical studies first. So now I feel completely stuck. Should I let him go and try to move on, acting as if the past six months never happened? Or should I hold on to him because I truly believe what we have is real and meaningful? Should I tell him to go ahead and marry if that's what his situation requires? I honestly don't know what to do. Love is such a crazy thing. I would really appreciate any advice.

I am an officer in an Indian PSU from a lower middle-class General category family with two elder sisters and parents. Joining PSU was a major achievement. Academically bright, I was raised to deeply respect women, instilled with superhero-like morality, ethics, and honesty. Conditioned to believe women don't want s**x while men crave it, I idealized purity. I look decent but not tall/attractive, remain introverted, self-critical, and conscientious. Some life events shook me, making me question if life is worth living. Previously posted remotely, I transferred to a corporate location. A senior engaged girl (good-looking, officers' union position) joined my department. Her fiancé worked in her hometown. As a boy craving female attention but with low self-esteem, I never initiated. Boss directed her to me for work doubts, leading to conversations. She was extroverted. She invited me for lunch walks, movies, brought midnight birthday cake in the shared township hostel. This was my first serious female interaction. She shared sob stories about ill-treatment by parents/family, forced arranged marriage instead of love, toxic exes, calling me a "nice guy." She invited me to her room at midnight twice, once drunk saying she loved me. I maintained boundaries due to morality, her upcoming marriage, and low confidence—never crossed lines despite growing attachment and falling for her. After a 2-week work trip, she suddenly distanced herself, acting normal. I asked; she blamed me. We resumed friendly walks/talks. I later learned she had lived with another guy (transferred) and was close to another senior (Karan) from previous department. Suspicious, I saw Karan visiting her hostel at midnight. She pressured me to drink. I discovered she was s**xually involved with Karan even a week before her wedding (he attended). Shocked and traumatized by her happy wedding reels. Post-wedding, she continued the affair with Karan. I subtly confronted her emotional state, lies, and my role. She dismissed my vulnerabilities, maintained victim acts and multiple lies. Emotionally cold, no empathy. I confronted out of frustration; she turned hostile, blocked me everywhere, told me to "die," and acted like nothing happened. I turned to ChatGPT for therapy as I couldn't share with anyone (feared dismissal as "fool chasing married woman"). She enjoyed manipulation, cheating, and sadism. Karan enabled it (he's married now). This shattered my trust, caused deep trauma. As a woman in power (senior, union), confronting risks career. I feel inhumanly discarded after sharing vulnerabilities. Reflecting on narcissism, society, politicians—wonder why moral/emotional people like me suffer. Is this how high society functions?

My father was suffering from terminal cancer and passed away just three days after my marriage. Due to financial difficulties, my inter-caste marriage was conducted through Arya Samaj. After marriage, I discovered that many promises made about my husband's job, family status, and financial condition were untrue. Soon after, I faced financial hardship, emotional neglect, and continuous domestic violence. Despite being a bright student, I had to put my education aside because of family circumstances. After the birth of my son, there were times when I did not even have money to buy milk for him. I started working to support my family and later enrolled in IGNOU for graduation, but my husband's lack of support and dishonesty affected my studies. I managed work, childcare, household responsibilities, and education largely on my own. The abuse in my marriage continued for years. I suffered severe physical violence, resulting in permanent hearing damage and the need for hearing aids in both ears. During this period, I secured a government job on my first attempt and continued supporting my son financially, including paying rent and school fees, while also completing my graduation and starting a master's degree. Over the years, I discovered that my husband was involved in multiple extramarital relationships. I endured humiliation, verbal abuse, threats, and even an attempt to physically harm me. Eventually, I filed for divorce. Even now, I have not sought alimony or maintenance from him, despite the difficulties I have faced. During one of the most difficult phases of my life, a senior colleague entered my life. He is a 38-year-old Muslim man working as an AEE in the R&B Department. For the past three years, he has supported me emotionally and financially without expecting anything in return. He has always respected my boundaries, never pressured me for marriage, and has remained a constant source of support for both me and my son. Today, I feel emotionally attached to him and believe he possesses the qualities of a caring life partner. However, I remain conflicted because of social expectations, religious differences, and concerns about how such a decision may affect my family and future. My divorce case is still ongoing, and while I have rebuilt my life through hard work and determination, I now find myself facing one of the most important decisions of my life: whether to move forward with this relationship or continue alone. I am seeking genuine advice on how to make a decision that is best for me, my son, and my future

28 M I grew up in a very remote valley in Himachal Pradesh. So remote that we basically had only three career options: join the Army or become a shepherd, or leave the valley and build a life elsewhere. I chose the third option. I studied engineering in Delhi. During college, I faced a lot of bullying. Since we come from a cold, remote region of Himachal, our skin tone tends to be much paler than that of many other Indians due to the climate. That became one of the reasons I was targeted during ragging. People labeled me as "gay" and subjected me to various forms of harassment. I had to endure a lot. After graduation, I got placed in a company in Chennai. However, my mother was completely against the idea of me moving there. One of my cousins had told her that he had seen on social media that in Tamil Nadu, Brahmins were either set on fire after kerosene was poured on them or tied to trees and stoned to death. Because of this, my mother absolutely refused to let me go. She wanted me to join the Army like many others from our village.. But I came to Chennai anyway, more or less against her wishes. It has been two months now. Honestly, I have not faced any racism here so far. In fact, I experienced far more ragging and harassment in my college , Delhi from some seniors . After two months here, I can honestly say that Chennai is actually a pretty good place.

I am a 28-year-old male in an arranged marriage setup. Our roka is done and engagement is scheduled soon. I am a virgin with no past relationships, romantic involvement, or physical experience. My fiancée is 25. A few months into our relationship, she started opening up about her past. Initially, she told me about one relationship where she had physical intimacy twice. Recently, after several difficult conversations, she disclosed more details: - A boyfriend in 10th class. According to her, everyone in school knew about them. She says they hugged but never kissed. - A boyfriend from her first office. According to her, everyone there knew about the relationship. She says they loved each other, but she ended it because he was very negative and discouraging. - A man she met through a friend of a friend, with whom she had physical intimacy twice. She later found out he was involved with another girl and ended things. - Another man she met through Instagram. According to her, she was ready to become physical with him, but left after realizing he was only using her to get over his ex. - An office senior who kissed her forehead multiple times. She says she never kissed him romantically and was never physical with him because she felt he was mainly interested in her body. She has also told me about a phase in her life where she drank heavily after being emotionally hurt and sometimes spent time with random groups of people at wine shops or on the roadside. She strongly insists that she was never physical with anyone during that phase. The issue is not that I discovered any cheating. In fact, she has been very loving and emotionally expressive with me. She wears a pendant with my name, talks about our future, reassures me frequently, says she feels safe with me, and recently cried when she thought I wanted to end the relationship. My struggle is that I am a virgin with no past, while her past is much more extensive than I expected. Learning all of this has affected me more than I thought it would. I constantly find myself thinking things like: - What if there is still more that I don't know? - What if some details were minimized? - What if there were more emotional or physical experiences than she disclosed? - Am I struggling because of her past, or because I keep searching for certainty? What confuses me is that she continues to be very affectionate and patient with me, even when I become distant or harsh because of my overthinking. She has even taken oaths that she is telling me the truth, but I still find myself doubting. I have started to realize that even when I get answers, my mind often moves on to the next doubt. That makes me wonder whether my real problem is her past or my inability to tolerate uncertainty. Has anyone here been in a similar situation where you were a virgin with no past, but your future spouse had multiple relationships and some physical history? - How did you deal with the constant thoughts and comparisons? - How did you rebuild trust when there wasn't actual cheating, but there was a lot of anxiety? - Did acceptance come with time, or was there something specific that helped? - How do you tell the difference between a genuine trust issue and your own overthinking? I would really appreciate honest advice from people who have gone through something similar.

Confession of a 35-Year-Old Man I am a 35-year-old man, married with a son. I was an average student and completed Civil Engineering from a very ordinary college. Soon after graduation, I lost a government job opportunity when the recruitment process was cancelled. Not wanting to depend on my father, I started working with a salary of just ₹10,000 per month. Over the years, I worked my way up from small companies to MNCs, often doing site work, night shifts, and even 24-hour duties. After marriage, my wife and I lived with my parents and contributed to household expenses. I later moved into an office role, which gave me time to prepare for competitive exams. Eventually, I secured a contractual government job. During the same period, my younger brother developed a serious gambling habit. My father repeatedly helped him financially, hoping he would improve. My wife often raised concerns about his behaviour, but nobody paid much attention. Then my father suddenly passed away. His death changed everything. As the elder son, I took responsibility for the family finances. I used settlement money to clear housing loans, car loans, and even my brother's education loan. After everything was settled, my mother was left with around ₹18 lakh in savings. A few months later, my brother got a government job on compassionate grounds. I was happy because my father had always worried about his future. About a year later, after years of preparation, I finally achieved my own dream and secured a permanent government job with nearly three times my previous salary. The only condition was relocating to another state. Around the same time, my brother wanted a grand wedding despite the girl's family being willing to have a simple Gurudwara marriage. He pressured my mother so much that she eventually spent nearly ₹10–12 lakh from her savings on the wedding. Unfortunately, marriage changed nothing. After the wedding, we discovered the extent of his debts. He had borrowed heavily, taken loans against my mother's pension, and eventually got suspended from his government job due to allegations of fraud and bribery. My mother received around ₹60,000 as family pension after my father's death. Over time, huge amounts of that money disappeared into gambling debts, loan repayments, wedding expenses, and financial crises created by my brother. In total, she spent around ₹25 lakh or more trying to save him. Whenever she stopped giving money, he would emotionally blackmail her. He claimed creditors would beat him, threatened self-harm, and created one crisis after another. Sometimes strangers would call saying he was lying injured somewhere. Other times he would claim to be hospitalized after accidents. My mother would panic and send money, only to later discover that many of these incidents were exaggerated or completely false. His marriage eventually collapsed. His wife left him. Jewellery was sold. My late father's car disappeared to settle debts. Even fixed deposits created by my father were broken and used. All this happened while I was living hundreds of kilometres away trying to manage my own family and job. The constant calls, emergencies, and emotional pressure became exhausting. Relatives eventually advised me to bring my mother to live with me because the environment had become unsafe. I brought her with me, hoping things would improve. But even after everything, my mother continued worrying about my brother and getting emotionally pulled into his problems. Every few weeks there would be another crisis, another phone call, another request for money, another story. Over time, I realized that every conversation about these issues affected my mental health. I would remain disturbed for days. It started affecting my peace, my marriage, and my relationship with my son. Today, I have reduced contact significantly. I still care for my mother and want her to be safe, but I can no longer keep carrying the emotional burden of decisions that are not mine. My question to the group is this: Am I wrong for creating distance from my mother for the sake of my own mental well-being? Every time I talk to her, I get dragged back into the same cycle of stress, guilt, and anxiety because my brother continues the same behaviour and my mother still struggles to stop enabling him. At what point does protecting your own peace stop being selfish and become necessary? I genuinely want honest opinions.

I don't know if I am just being unreasonable and I should just shut up and stop expecting things from life or that I am living in a loveless marriage.  1.5 crazy years have passed. He sent me connect request on matrimonial app , profile was good so I proceeded further. He was ok with supporting me financially after marriage after quitting my clinic and shifting to a new place which will take a while. His widowed mother lives with us and married sister half hour away. After marriage we didn't go to honeymoon and mother in law said she cancelled it saying he has lots of expenses to pay attention to. When one day I was unable to receive my mother's call, she called him and she picked up, saying I am fine and adjusting well in house and refused to give his phone to him. That was the first time I realised she doesn't like my mother at all. When he started spending some money on me, like bringing me back from parent's home and buying me some new clothes, she created a scene. Since then, he never took me out anywhere. She video called her daughter to show what all he brought for me and screamed. Neither her nor her daughter has any boundaries. Within a month I became pregnant and although children are blessings, I was sceptical if I ever be able to raise the baby especially since I was unemployed at that time with no stable income. Have to admit in initial first trimester she was actually nice to me for a change. Then started her actual satanic torture. She started accusing me of stinking badly and kept saying that ever since I came to this house, it stinks of me. She made me wash my bags, daily hair wash,made me buy fabric conditioner and when she was still not satisfied, threw my bags. Yet she randomly entered our room frequently and sniffed and said the room stinks and opened windows without my permission. Kept seperate stick to lift my washed clothes to examine. My husband also started saying that I stink after filling his head with nothing but hatred for me. I had heightened senses during my first trimester yet I had to tolerate strong smells of fabric conditioner and floor cleaners and bleach. When we shifted to our new house, his sister and daughter with his mother slept in our room and me and husband in common room. Next day she used the same stick to remove the bedsheet on the side where I slept. I did not tell my family about any of this thinking it will hurt them. We even stopped going for walks after she got paranoid and thought I give him my phone to speak to my parents during that time. She is a terrible cook yet says to everyone that listen that everyone says they like her cooking. She only has to cook in the house while I cut onions and tomatoes and doesn't even make us something we actually like and barely adds and seasonings and condiments just because she doesn't like. Even when she's not at home her son is supposed to inform and ask her permission to go anywhere and inform her when he reaches too. He doesn't inform me where he goes and when I ask her she sometimes says but sometimes she says none of my business. Just days before my baby shower, my father had a heart attack and my mother looked after him in the hospital. None of my immediate family members attended my baby shower. Since my parents are at the hospital and I was uncomfortable staying with my relatives, I returned the next day where she started screaming with her daughter. She talked about everything from head to toe how she doesn't like us at all and she can marry her son off to someone better than me, how our wedding was not upto her expectations, how I didn't bring much gold in the family. I recorded everything on my phone and then revealed everything to my family. My husband has never been supportive nor he called out his mother for calling me useless and laughing that my family has no medical insurance to our maid. He simply verbally abused me and wrote terrible things on WhatsApp, saying that am an self loathing gold digger and marrying me was his biggest mistake and then deleting it. Left immediately after our son was born. Gave me no support whatsoever and constantly chatting with his family. He only messaged me on my birthday while none of his other family members even called or messaged. I had to get my family involved except my brother who stays abroad everyone were present and had the audacity to point fingers at me. My mother earlier had to yell at her for torturing her pregnant daughter. His sister started saying how I wear torn clothes she have seen it and how I leaked some of the information to their family friends. Although many months have passed and their behaviour is better than how it used to be, this problems still haven't stopped completely. There is hardly any intimacy in my so called marriage. He only watches movies till 2 am and play games on his phone. He even takes his phone to the bathroom and doesn't come out for hours. My mother in low still thinks she can dominate me like she does to her children. I have started giving them back so they call me nuisance creater and dramatic. I am worried about my child. I honestly want safe , happy environment for him. But we barely go out and have a good time, I barely had any money in my account,work has been unkind,husband doesn't give me money although he earns well. I am unhappy, I really am. I should have remained spinster all my life. I was a virgin before marriage, docile by nature, spends less money, respectful to people and excellent skills required for my work yet nothing is going my way. He doesn't want to go to marriage counsellor to make things work . My family is ready even if divorce happens and siblings will look after me and my child until I stand up on my feet.

M29 I resigned from my job and cannot face my girlfriend who is also working in same project. And it completely broke me. 2months after graduation (@21) I got a job in a renowned MNC in a different city. I got a crush on my TL, who is married and has a kid. I received so much help from this lady. She was lovely and generous. We bonded well. She used to bring lunch for me sometimes. I attended my first office party and she was there too, looking upset. I asked how is she doing, she said 'ok'. I was sitting in corner looking at people dancing, talking, I was very socially awkward to talk to anybody. In the middle of the party my TL came to me and said, she is leaving and asked how am I going to my pg, I said I will take a cab. She asked if I want to leave with her, so that she can drop me, I said yes. In the car she asked if I was feed well, I said I only had appetizers. She said she knows a good roadside food place, if I want to go. We had food and good conversation. She asked me to stay the in her apartment, I stayed. We had more conversation about our personal life at her apartment, about her husband, who work at merchant navy, didn't came home for past 5 years as he settled with someone in Canada, her daughter is studying in another city, how she struggle to brought her up. She cried, I don't know how to sympathies her, I tried to hug her, she hug me tight for 3-4 minutes. And then she kissed me, I felt a little bit awkward. But I kissed her back, we had the rest as well. What would you do if you woke up bedide a beautiful naked woman for the first time. I did the same thing, it was passionate from both the side. I left the next day from her apartment. We had this passionate encounter for next two years, every Friday night till mid Saturday, became a retual of our life, except the days when she visits her daughter or I go home town. After two years, she got promoted, I too got promoted, work pressure increased, and it becomes less frequent. And then stopped. We talked sometimes but not get physical. She suggested me to get settled down. One and half years back she got promoted to SDL, got two different projects including mine, I promoted as TL beginning of this year. And we hardly talk even. We respect each other's space and choice. Cut to February, a new girl joined our team, she is young and beautiful. I often take my team member for tea break, including her. One evening on weekend, April, she called me, didn't talked for a minute, I was scared, if any accident happened or what, I continuously asked what is happening, finally she answed she likes me and loves me. I said it's okay but it's not possible. I gave her 15-20 reasons why she should not be in relationship with me including our age gap. She convinced me nothing would matter if I agree. And I finally did. She visited my home met my mother and other family members, they liked her too. She told me that she will arrange a meeting with her mother as her father died at an early age. We were sitting in a restaurant waiting for her mother to meet me. Her mother came, I met, my leg started shaking, felt seek, sweating, I left the restaurant within 5 minutes. Her mother did not said a single word. She called my more than 100 times, she came to my door, I couldn't not opened it. I didn't not told her about my affair, she din't told me that her mother works in the same company.

I am actually from Kolkata. I am 35 years old, married, and settled in Delhi. I have a son and a daughter. Many years ago, when I was in college, I fell deeply in love with the younger sister of our tenant's wife. Our relationship with the tenants was never like a typical landlord-tenant relationship. We lived like one family. In fact, we all used to have dinner together at the same dining table. My mother used to say that our tenant was like her eldest son. Whenever my tenant's wife's younger sister came to visit, I could not take my eyes off her. She was extraordinarily beautiful—fair, with large expressive eyes. One glance at her was never enough. Eventually, I went to her college and proposed to her. She did not give me an answer at that time, but through her elder sister the matter reached my mother's ears. Although my mother never said anything directly, problems started indirectly because we were Brahmins and our tenants belonged to the Kayastha community. One day, my tenant's wife, whom I used to call "Boudi," told me directly, "Don't you know that you are Brahmins? Your mother will never accept this relationship. Then why are you unnecessarily following my sister?" Even after that, I did not give up. Day after day, I stood outside her college waiting for her. One day she told me that she would agree to the relationship on one condition. Since my mother was against it, she wanted me to secure either a government job or a highly paid job so that I could stand on my own. But as a college student, it was impossible for me to achieve that so quickly. She was exceptionally beautiful, and after finishing college she got married into a well-established family. Later she had a son. Everything seemed normal, and with time I had forgotten everything and moved on with my life.Two weeks ago, I heard from my mother that her husband and in-laws had subjected her to terrible abuse for years. She had returned to her mother's house many times, but each time her mother persuaded her to go back and try once more, hoping things would improve. The last time, too, her mother sent her back saying, "Try one last time. Maybe things will get better." She truly made it her last attempt. She went up to the terrace, poured kerosene over herself, and set herself on fire. She survived in the hospital for three days in that condition, and then everything came to an end. I cannot accept that the woman I once loved so deeply reached such a tragic end because she could no longer endure the cruelty of her husband and in-laws. Today marks nineteen days since her death, and I still cannot believe it. Sometimes I wonder—if we had gone against everything and gotten married back then, perhaps she would still be alive today. Perhaps she would have been with me. Perhaps she would have been the mother of my children. I am unable to concentrate on anything. I find no peace. Sometimes I feel like leaving everything behind—my home, my job, everything—and just disappearing.

I(28m earning ₹30LPA) am in the arrange marriage market for a few months now. All I wanted was to find some one who is equally educated, ambitious, had good skills, has good work experience etc., the proposals coming my way are a little surprising. Recently a dentist's proposal came, they demanded a reverse dowry(I never demanded anything, I am strictly against it). They said, I should be the one, to open a clinic for her i.e. buy her own clinic upon marriage. I asked her, where do you practice currently and she said she is not as she is not able to find some where to practice(if i remember correctly she graduated a while back)... Essentially jist was, she would rather sit home than take a low pay(unacceptable to her) job at some clinic where she might learn the trade in real world. Her parents know I make decent income. 2nd category is homely girls, they have gone to college, but thats it. Maybe did some bsc/msc/bcom types placeholder degree from their local college and sits at home waiting to be married, expects to be a home maker... Talked to one, I was really lost on what to talk, some how conversation turned towards iphones lol. Similarly educated, but has a lot of emotional baggage, 1 girl I met told me she just came out of a 6 years long relationship, from the things she said, she was still dealing with issues... Later I find out she has a lot of situationships as well... I avoid judging people, but I wanna avoid this kind of a person, who has a body count. My requirement is simple, similarly educated(masters or higher), is in good standing career wise, and is ambitious, her ultimate plan is to do stuff rather than sitting at home, not been in too many relationships or have baggage(I dont as well.)... Not drink/smoke as i dont as well. I try and look for signs of excellence. I wont mind marrying some one with hustle. Like I wont mind marrying a person who is well versed in trades like a chef who is running her successful hustle (or even is capable of, very hard to tell though). They may not have a reputed degree or a college... But they did something, Iykwim. Is this too much to ask?

I am 32 M, I have recently connected with a 29F CA through a dating app. We have ended up talking a lot over calls and are trying to know each other. The connection is quite strong, we both feel the conversation is effortless. No one is pretending, we are talking about lot of things. Having the time of life like college kids. Which we both thought never would happen at the later stage of life. We are both scared and both come with some baggage as usual. We are talking a lot and she’s from a town in Maharashtra, currently she’s in Chennai for a Job and she commutes once every 30 days to work from home and stay in work from office and I am settled in Mumbai with my business. We are both from same caste and have a lot of things to converse about. We have decided to meet in Chennai for a fee days to understand each other. I am hesitant to say ‘I Love you’ because it seems like something you say with meaning and I feel it’s too soon. Even though the connection is great and time doesn’t matter. But Because of past experiences, I am hesitant to express. However, She expressed love yesterday and feels sure, says she is also scared. But saying, we are past the I Like you stage and I was an in an awkward state and I feel to I have to say it back. Apart from this, everything has been great and wonderful. I just don’t know if this is too early, or am I overthinking. Also, she has a good package of 22LPA, I make a decent turnover but with current economy and business in Information and Technology field, I have to make sure expenses are in control in a city like Mumbai and all savings, portfolio of assets etc. need to be managed. She plans to make money through the current job, make a substantial amount in savings and stay at home or start a practice and start a family when time comes which I am absolutely fine with, as I was a single child with both parents working. So, I know how difficult it is. With my earnings and my parents savings and assets, we can sustain living a comfortable life. I am treating her earnings and savings as backup only. With this information. Life with luxury, I am not sure, ofcourse I want to earn with my business but that’s also comes with a risk. And I am ethical, so it makes more difficult to earn a lot of money. It will take 5 years to get a stable amount of 2-3 lakhs withdrawal from it every month. She’s not high maintenance, she’s very humble and has good savings as per her age and career. Ofcourse, with time we will be able to understand more about each other. But, a lot of things align between us and our understanding and expectations match a lot. Please share your thoughts and experiences. 🙏🏻 thank you

F27, I have been in a relationship with a person for the past five years. He is very understanding and supportive, but he has faced many family-related challenges in his life. Because of those issues, he could not complete his college education. He tried preparing for government jobs for some time, and later moved into a private job, working hard to settle his life and build a stable future. On my side, I am not from a financially wealthy family, but I have a stable job. We are now planning to move towards marriage. However, I am worried about whether his family will accept me. Although they are financially more stable than my family, they already have some grievances towards him because of past family issues. At the same time, many of his relatives are supportive of our relationship. I do not own a house, and I am still trying to improve my financial situation and build a better life. I often worry whether factors such as not owning a house or financial differences between our families could create problems when it comes to marriage. I also wonder how I will handle all these challenges. Since my parents are financially and physically weak, I may have to manage most of the marriage expenses on my own. Despite all these concerns, one thing gives me happiness and confidence: he is genuinely supportive and always prioritizes my well-being. He never judges me based on financial status or external circumstances. Still, I live with a constant fear about the future, family acceptance, and financial responsibilities. I am also planning to switch jobs for a better package so that I can improve my situation further. How can I overcome these fears and approach this phase of life with more confidence?

F-33 Hi everyone, I need some advice. I'm feeling stuck right now. I want to start working, but my daughter is only 2.5 years old, and we're also planning for a second baby. Sometimes I feel that another pregnancy will put my career on hold for another 2–3 years, and I'll fall further behind professionally. Along with this, I have household responsibilities, and my daughter will start playschool next July. My husband is working in a private job and helps me whenever he can, but due to his work schedule, he doesn't have much time to share the major responsibilities. I have a background in web development, but I'm confused about what to do next qki 2023 k bad mein working nhi hun. Sometimes I think about preparing for a government job, and other times I look for a stable work-from-home opportunity. I also don't feel comfortable hiring a nanny because I have trust issues when it comes to leaving my daughter in someone else's care. Lately, I feel demotivated and unsure about my career direction. Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you manage your career, kids, and family responsibilities together? I would really appreciate your advice. ❤️ Thanks and best wishes for all....

Please help me understand what to do and how to handle this situation. It’s becoming suffocating, and I genuinely feel like I can’t cope with it anymore. I apologize in advance for the length of this post. I’m a 26-year-old male currently in a long-distance relationship with a 25-year-old woman. We were classmates at university, and I developed feelings for her almost instantly. We became close friends and remained so until I finally confessed my feelings around three years ago. At that time, in 2023, she turned me down. Although we stayed friends afterward, our friendship was never quite the same. In 2024, she moved abroad and eventually cut contact with me. Despite how deeply I loved her, I accepted her decision. We remained completely out of touch for approximately 18 months, and honestly, that period was one of the most difficult times of my life. Last year, in August, she returned, and we met with the intention of ending things properly and moving on. However, unexpectedly, that meeting led us in the opposite direction. Instead of ending things, we decided to give the relationship a chance. Within a week, we found ourselves in a long-distance relationship. Things progressed gradually, yet at the same time very naturally. Alhamdulillah, throughout our friendship and relationship, we have maintained our dignity, values, and boundaries. We have never engaged in anything inappropriate. We have never even held hands. Everything seemed to be going well until recently. Both of our families know about our relationship and are supportive of it. I am very close to her family, and she has met my family as well and feels comfortable with them. The problem is that every few months, roughly every three months since August, she begins questioning her feelings. She starts wondering whether she truly loves me or not. I don’t know whether this happens because I am extremely expressive, affectionate, and emotionally invested in the relationship. Despite the distance, I try my best to make it feel as though there is no distance between us. I put a lot of effort into the relationship and encourage her to do certain things as well, often for her own benefit and for the health of the relationship. However, things have recently reached a point where I feel overwhelmed. She now says that she can only see the relationship not working out in the future, which indirectly feels like she’s talking about a breakup. Yet at the same time, she insists that she wants this relationship to work more than anything else. As for me, I am naturally expressive, loving, caring, protective, and admittedly a little possessive. I don’t control her life or decisions, but I do worry about her safety. For example, I appreciate simple updates when she’s out, such as letting me know when she has left home or arrived safely. Nothing beyond that. I also enjoy talking to her and hearing her voice, so I often ask if we can call. I know it’s not always possible, but I genuinely love speaking with her. Lately, however, even that seems to have become too much for her. She, on the other hand, is far less expressive. She tends to be avoidant, often isolates herself, and withdraws when things become emotionally overwhelming. She behaved this way even when we were just friends, and she continues to do so now. She says that she wishes she could love me the way I love her. When she feels unable to match my level of affection or effort, she begins questioning whether she loves me at all. This cycle has now reached a boiling point and is causing serious strain on both of us. I genuinely don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t want to lose her. I prayed for her for years, made countless efforts, and when we reunited after all that time apart, it felt too meaningful to be a coincidence. It felt like something destined, something worth fighting for. One final thing worth mentioning is that this is the first relationship either of us has ever been in. Before this, neither of us had ever been involved with the opposite gender in any romantic capacity—not even as close friends. I would truly appreciate any advice, perspective, or guidance