Comments for Post #C27599

⬆️ reason to stay single!! These posts literally inspire us to stay single! Anyway, advice let him be the momma boy he wants to be.. he is happy with his mommy and doesnt even wanna stay with u and his kid let him be with her… and let him be deluded by that phd.. Secondly, unfortunately you might have to leave one job in case u wanna take care of ur daughter.. please dont depend on anyone, i understand ur family must be exhausted too, as they are growing old they have to look after a kid too, its exhausting.. And don’t ever, ever give up on ur career.. im sure you are gonna excel in your field and your daughter and your family is gonna be so so proud of you..!! And your daughter will one day will understand all the sacrifices you did.. Forget everything and focus on your career! You are an excellent mom and a doctor We as fellow doctors are very proud of you and how hardworking you are.. hats off!!

Never compromise your career, no matter what. Your husband doesn’t support you or your daughter. Is this really how you want to live? Get a nanny for your daughter to ease the pressure on your parents.

Choice is your .. Your parents were right .. after doing 3 masters and still your husband is unemployed that means he never wanted to get employed as he knew he was marrying a gold mine .. So now he is enjoying and you are husband of the house .. it's all your decision .

You are really great....though having these many issues, you are proving your worth as a doctor. Hats off to you. Please don't leave your job. Try to keep one nanny at home from morning to evening to take care of your daughter. As you will not be at home, leave child in mom's house and hire nanny there only. So that parents too can relax. Concentrate on your career and the kid. Stop trying to bring husband back. It's just a mental pressure to you.

1. Divorce him 2. Hire 2 helps . 12 hrs each 3. During ur week offs keep ur phn aside n just be available for ur daughter. 4. Once she grows up show her the actual picture n surely she wud understand n admire you. 5. Keep ur parents nearby. In that way ur daughter will get love. But amke sure they have people handy to not toil entire day. You are doing great. M sailing in the same boat n trust me , we ladies can do much much better for ourselves n the one we give birth. Just be afloat. N surely this s d golden time for ur career ,pls concentrate there too n leave any any expectations from ur husband's or in-laws end. Ekla Cholo re !

Keep nanny n ignore leave ur husband for good

I thought doctors can survive just by setting up a small clinic .

Mujhe he has done 3 masters pe hi doubt ho gaya tha 💀 Now u know why he has done 3 masters. Just let him live with his mother, stop supporting them in any form, not even by a single rupee. Live with ur daughter only.

I wonder how can a doctor with too many degreea cannot earn?. . atleast he can start a clinic on his own. .

ur husband is doctor and still unemployed why?

First mistake - marrying an unemployed person in AM set up Second mistake - getting pregnant immediately with an unemployed husband who is living in a different city and before completing your masters Third mistake - continuing this marriage

Hire a nanny to ease your parenting roles and to relieve ur parents of the pressure. Forget about the husband as you are a single parent already.

I hate saying this, but things don't look good for you legally. Divorce may be messy if he decides to file for custody. He may argue that he was unemployed even before you were married, and you initiated the alliance knowing his situation fully well. He may also point out that you're too busy to look after your child, and that he cared for her initially while helping u build your career, and that he's in a better position to take care of your child. He may even use this as an excuse to ask you for maintenance and child support. Indian laws do favour women but also recognize a man's responsibility towards old parents. If he says he's having depression or something due to which he's unable to find a full time job, that's another point in his favor. So your case is more complicated. Speak to a good lawyer to understand possible outcomes and legal process. In the meantime, stop expecting him to change. Hire a nanny, find a better paying job. But whatever you do, dont give up ur career. You've worked too hard for it.

If there's no partnership then no point in staying in that marriage . Let him live with his mother.

How are they surviving if they don't have jobs (both your husband & MIL)? Probably they have enough money to live—doing nothing? We don't know the other side of the story, but it's of course not good for anyone to stay idle for both mental and physical beings. But as long as he is not a bad person or not addicted to any substance, I won't worry much. He will eventually get in to act. He must have reasons why he is not forcing himself on things that he doesn't like just for the sake of money. 33 y.o is still pretty young i guess

You better to choose some job for him in the place you are working

You already know that you are single mother. So stop convincing/requesting him for anything. Take divorce or think that you are a widow. Hire nanny or put your child in daycare. Concentrate on your career. Save money for your & her future.

You are doing a great job as mother. Keep up the good work because I feel the toughest job in the world is being a mother (because you have multiple hats managing carrier, kids, finance etc. (i can relate and understand your pain). I have 2 suggestions - 1. If you still love your husband and want to give him a chance - drop your daughter at your husbands place, let them take care of the child and only give financial support needed for the child. I know it's tough to leaves kids and stay but sometimes by doing this - he might be able to understand the responsibilities and probably change. Irrespective of that if he doesn't change then better to divorce. 2 suggestion - 1. i hope your daughter is already or close to 3 years - start sending her to daycare because eventually she has to start going to school one day (my daughter was 7 months baby and i had no choice but report back to work - i have a large family but when I needed the support due to everyone's personal schedule, distance I didnt get support. So, I had no choice but started taking my daughter to the daycare. Back then the daycare was in my office - she used to stay in daycare for 9 hrs (as 9hrs is my office) plus 4 hrs journey back and forth to office). That way your parents will get little time for themselves. 2. Dont give up on your carrier. 3. Give ultimatium to your husband that you will divorce him (if required send one lawyers notice. So he understands the seriousness). 4. I'm not forcing you to divorce as it is your personal choice whether you want to live in marriage just for the heck of it or continue to be a single mom with or without husband that decision is your's (your husband would have got used to enjoying his life without job and having time just for him. So it is hard to push him to do some job - even i faced similar situation personally but later after too many arguments and fights my husband started to work (even today he keeps saying he wants to quit but i keep motivating, forcing, sometimes fights and arguments to ensure he continues with his job, as we have 2 kids).

Stay where you are right now. Give him an ultimatum. Either he shifts to your hometown, finds a job or earns more than you in his hometown to take care of you and your daughter. Otherwise tell him that you are considering legal separation. Simple

You can invite your parents here to stay with you They will take care of the daughter too and you too will be able to spend some time with them ✨

Hire a nanny for your daughter, have one last discussion about what he wants to do, stop sending money to him, if you are doing it already.. in the next 6 months if you don't see any improvement - better leave him with his mother and cut off all contacts with them.. 6 years is a lot of time to invest in someone who is not ready to support you or daughter in any ways and who doesnot seems to have any plans of settling down

Don't waste your time on him. Consult a good lawyer and leave him. Your daughter will be easier when she turns 5. Toddlers are difficult to manage but once they turn 5, they start to get easier.

U both studied in same college..means sane med college. It sounds like both of u r docs. Then how come he needs a job?

Responsibilities it should be in his head .. so that he can understand. Take a long leave tell them you resigned. Go to his place .. make him to spend for you both .. ask him about future plans. . if he have wealth to spend without earning.. what is the purpose for you to work hard .. A doctor knows doctor responsibility aprom en than doctor pullaiku doctor aliance than venum nu nikkuringalo terila. ..

Madam u should hire a househelper for ur daughter set up cctv cameras into ur house for better lookafter and focus on ur financial well-being money solve every problem and maintain distance with husband to prove ur importance he will definitely change and at last u r mother u can do what u want

1. Dont lose job t any cost.2. Find a best time where tha baby need you and arrange the job schedule accordingly or else try to quit from low income job.... 3. Discuss one more time with hubby and MIL abot future 4. Practice ad move on to next level with some couraga as amready you have corssed more hardjaip to give bright furure to the kid.. Hope you understood

As a man, if you ask for my advice, I believe you should leave the situation behind and focus on yourself, your daughter, and your career. When you have peace of mind and emotional stability, you'll be in a much better position to handle life's challenges. Marriage is like a car with two driving wheels—both partners need to move forward together to keep the relationship going. If only one person is carrying all the responsibility, the pressure eventually becomes too much. It's not necessarily true that your husband can't get a job. And even if finding employment is difficult, I believe people should try to create opportunities for themselves. As a doctor, he has the knowledge and qualifications to start a small practice if he truly wants to. From what you've shared, the issue doesn't seem to be you. The real problem is that he isn't willing to take responsibility for his own family—you and your daughter. Taking care of his mother is important, but it shouldn't become a way to avoid his responsibilities as a husband and father. A man should be able to balance both.

You continue to do your current job! And keep little or less talking with MIL / husband ! If they understood you finally, they may come to live with you. Bcz if everywhere only you willl be sacrificing and also when u shift at their city, and still jf disturb you then you would feel broken ! Better to go as whatever it is going !

You're not struggling because of a lack of effort. You're struggling because you're carrying the responsibilities of two adults while your husband refuses to carry his share. A marriage cannot survive if only one person keeps sacrificing. It's time to stop waiting for potential and start making decisions based on reality.

Leave him ASAP!

Leave him simple

Hire a good nanny.it nay lessen the burden of your parents

Divorce! Do not expect any alimony or settlement also, keep working on your career and eventually, you'll start earning even more. Do not take my opinion as harsh, but it is what it is. He is irresponsible, does not earn, does not stay at home to take care of the child. He is a father and a husband, but only on papers, he does not behave like one. You are already living without him, so what difference does it make when you leave him. Infact, it will be a good ridance, because now you won't have to worry about him being around and losing yourself in expectations. Your financial situation might remain the same, but your mental/emotional burden will be gone.

Please do not compromise on your career. Please hire a nanny and continue your work. Leave your husband alone. Just ignore. And may be consider divorce

3 masters and no job even with mbbs? Sounds like another chat gpt cooked up story

Temporarily stay with 2 jobs and spend time with your daughter. Don't send money to your husband

If you see it differently its the typical life of man. No time for family, they run to fulfill families needs, but hardly anytime to spend with family. You are undergoing so much for vibe. I see many good girls fall for wrong guys, while good boys wait a long long time for a bride. It's sad hun.

Aisi ladkiya kaise nallo l chakkar me pd jaati btao. Yaha ladki k liye sab kro fir bhi kisi aur shadi kr leti

A man’s primary duty is to provide and protect. If he doesn’t do that then you are better off alone. Please divorce and focus on yourself.

No.. Live your own life 👍

Confessor and her husband studied in same college or school? Or is she calling matriculation as her college? If they were in same college then he is also a doctor. As for him not working and not taking responsibility it is better to stop spending on him and his mother. Rather send a divorce notice. Already confessor is staying single so why waste time and energy on someone who cannot make adjustments in his life

You say you are an established doctor but how did you not have proper planning skills, how did you as a doctor get pregnant immediately in an arranged marriage with an unemployed husband, knowing how difficult caesarean section is. Anyways legally your position is very weak, you will get zero alimony and no financial support to raise your daughter. Husband will never like a highly accomplished woman bossing him over. Understand the social cues. Get divorced and get a nanny. Legally no court will ask a son to leave his mother, so you have to shift with MIL. Opposite is never going to happen. Your daughter is completely your responsibility doc, early you realise, peaceful it will be for you. Just sad to hear that one contraceptive pill would have saved you lot of stress and worries.

I don't understand u told u r a Dr ..n Ur hubby doing PhD.. Can we explain this?

Don't think more about your husband get any nanny for your daughter and foucos on your career. What kind a man he is . I think he don't want to do any thing just want to sleep and eat. You are strong lady just foucos on your future!!

DIVORCE!!! AND LIVE IN PEACE!!! You're already living separately despite being married. You're already living as a single mother and he's not interested in being a responsible parent either. Annul your marriage and live a free life!

Leave your husband

File a divorce case and ask for alimony because If he haven't spent from last 6 years any amount then it's high time you are earning it's good ask for a child some monthly maintainance that will be good you can get rid of the marriage and some savings n amount also coming for your child n you can give time to you child

Even after so many responsibilities if he is not willing to start earning money then he never will. Now you need to decide whether to carry on this leech of a person all along your life or you can separately live for yourself and your child. In my opinion, if you separate (not divorce) it might drill some sense into him. But the decision is entirely yours, what you want from your life.

Dr to Mota paisa kmate h

Pls dont leave ur job. Ur husband clearly enjoying ur har earned money. Hire a nanny so that ur parents get time at ur mothers place only. U clearly ask ur husband what he wants. If he wants to live his mother stop sending money if u r sending. Let him do himself. U r doing great and save for u daughter.

Yr itni lambi Kahani Ye Log Likh Kaise Lete Hai ...

why do u need this guy for paper just give him a written document ,wake him up if he is doctor what is he doing .Has he done his. Dr in Russia ? .You too need to wake up why the hell u need this man if he doesn't give have interest to work money doesn't matter but a personwho doesn't even work are physically as well as mentality challenged person.Let him peacefully take care of his mother .and thank him that he showed his color within years .You need to wake up doctor .You dont need him marriage is not about moneybut it's collaboration where inputs r from both side .

Divorce.

I think you should get a divorce. Hire a nanny. Maybe eventually remarry if you'd like, after carefully choosing a good partner. But do not stick with this man. Please run and take full custody of your daughter.

Choose your self

Usually I don't respond never heard such stories

You are such a nice women , should have got a wife like you

You missed a major red flag . 🚩 This person was getting married without a job at hand . What income is his family surviving on ? Judging from your post , he has no intention to work . Contact a good lawyer first , know your options , cut him loose . Hire a nanny or house-help that can ease your parents child care burden. Few more years , when you are settled in your career well, you can take regular time offs to spend with the child. Anyway she will start full time school soon . You can even bring her to your workplace for an hour or two. Your daughter will grow up to be a better person that way , than watching a mother that bends over backwards for a useless guy.

Lesson never marry when your broke

You're a real strong independant woman More Power to you Divorce that useless guy Hire a full time maid Work hard become a great Dr and enjoy your life Gracefully

Don't leave your current job also don't support financially to your husband/his family.

Can I know from which city !!

Stay where you are, hire more help to look after your daughter and parents and live in peace.

don't leave your current job. he can travel, can't he (even if he is stuck to his mommy)? perhaps he is one of those guys who is over-qualified for any job. that happens everywhere. let him understand your situation more and appreciate you more. best wishes.

Divorce

Divorce bro !!!

Leave

Leave

Looking at your husband's profile, not earning for past six years, plssss hang on to your work, your job, your source of income. Other than your parents, your daughter, your income is your only support system. Six years should be enough to give up on/ any expectations from your husband. Hire a nanny or enrol daughter in full time day care. Soon the kid will head to school. You are wonderful and strong. All the best.

You should get rid of him and and his expenses. Hire a good nanny who can be with ur child.

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your husband has MD degrees from abroad and doing nothing? what a waste of money 😂 even doctors are not getting job dude, and you ,a simple graduate thinking about 1 lakh per months job ? 🤣😂

Whatever u said if it's true then beleive me u r angel... If ur husband is stunt ...then leave him provide well education to ur daughter..take a divorce..and live ur life

LEAVE HIM

Unfortunately he will remain like thus as he has become dependent on you. So no matter how much you try he will not become financially independent and his mother is making it worse. Take a step. Hire help four daughter and make a wise decision.

If a well established doctor is facing this imagine what unemployed women face 🤦. You have nothing to gain from this relationship anymore and your daughter will grow up learning that this is okay. So go for a divorce, hire a nanny, focus on your career.

Very bad. I think u r cooperative from the points which can be observed.for male work is needed. Don't put him in business it may go loss. Also don't shift because it gives you less. Establish urself well and if it didn't workout for him to move to ur place then walk out n get divorced. Verybad that u live alone..

Why want to stay in such kinda of marriage?🤬 Don't send any money to your husband and mil. Keep a nanny for your daughter,so that your parents feel the support,and take 2-3 days off from your job in every 2 months, ask your parents ,if they want to go somewhere, or you take your daughter ,and enjoy self and create bond between daughter too. Forgot husband and mil.

Divorce your husband. At least, you will have less stress, tension and obligation in your life with deadbeat husband gone. Next hire a nani or house help who can assist your parents with raising your daughter. Demand higher salary from two of your employers and let the one job go. Keep.the eyes on the future, your daughter will be big enough to go full time school and will be busy with her routine soon. Try to spend at least half an hr per day with her doing anything that interests her or just talk. Let the guilt of not spending enough time with your daughter go, you are doing as best as you can.

Very typical situation about a lazy and irresponsible husband.Marriage is crucial,request parents to support or hire a nanny. Stop financially supporting your lazy husband and MIL and inform him to be accountable. Hope and pray everything gradually changes with time🙏🏼

1. The jobs and the recognition and money associated with it is your saviour. 2. Your marriage is non-existancial from what you have written. 3. No financial or emotional assistance. You are exhausted, but regret to say you that don't expect much from your husband and MIL, don't move to that hometown and don't leave your parents ever. Keep at least 2 nannies/ayas/maids to help your parents, because they are also overworks. You will go for divorce or not that is your decision,but this guy will never do anything for you or your daughter.

Just ignore ur Husband and Mother in law, Don't sacrifice ur career for irresponsible husband! He simply don't want to do job!

Its time to leave the relationship. You married at the right time but to a wrong guy.

3 masters and no job.

All i can say after going through this post is ; If you would have been such as described in the post U would never have posted it here nor would u have Tolerated Ur husband in such way ...... #### seems like fake Narrative......

I think he's a scam. Check his documents and registration in medical council. One master's degree in medical field is 3 years. 3 masters means 9 years for PG after doing MBBS of 5.5 years. Very suspicious case.

Being in medico background , it’s very tough to lead this kind of life situations … unfortunately the chemistry between both hasn’t been working …raising a mommy boy leads to such flaw .. that’s why raising an independent child holds that’s accoutability..managing life tough situations !

Leave him. If he cannot take care of his wife and daughter then such a person doesn't deserve any respect. Degrees dont give you anything, it's the skills that pays u.

Sadley it seems that your husband is a WASTER that marries women then manpulates them to take care of him instead of a loving caring relationship.

Get your mistake rectified. Get divorce. You should not have married unemployed and become a mother at the same time.

You need to divorce that oversmart idiot.

U r doomed

Get a divorce asap. You are young and stupid ,change that.

That's not a partner that's a parasite!!!

Better get rid of those two parasites and live a good life with your daughter. He's too used to taking advantage of you. Divorce him. You have tolerated enough. Never leave your job, stay independent.

We are wasting our time and energy on these posts..They are not even real.Cooked up stories.

Divorce him now

Take divorce from such a man pleasw