Comments for Post #C28033

If it isn't affecting you or your relationship with this boy, then for now don't say anything. But keep the gate open, sudden disclosure may not be appropriate in this case but gradual disclosure. When you disclose, emphasis on your feelings at that time, what you went through, what were your thoughts about the incident, how things should have been handled etc. So that he will understand your trauma.

Sister, what happened with you in class 8 was NOT your fault. You were a child. He was an adult. He forced himself on you. That's abuse, not relationship. Your tauji family blamed you to save their son - that's their shame, not yours. About telling the office guy - You don't HAVE to tell everything to prove you are honest. It's your trauma, not a crime you did. If you trust him and see a future, you can say "I had a traumatic incident in childhood" without going into details. If he judges you for it, he is not the right person. Please talk to a counselor once, don't carry this alone for years. You are not impure, you are a survivor. More power to you.

You don’t owe anyone details about something that was forced on you. It was not your fault, and it wasn’t your “past” in the sense of something you chose. If you trust this man and see the relationship becoming serious, you can tell him when you feel safe and ready. His response will tell you a lot about his character. Most importantly, don’t let shame from what someone else did to you decide your future.

do not tell anyone let bygones be bygones

Yes tell him and stay away from other men