📝 Confession I (27M) met a girl (25F) at work around 2.5 years ago. We became close friends over time. She was one of the most respectful, simple and kind-hearted people I had ever met, and somewhere along the way I fell deeply in love with her. I confessed my feelings more than once over the years. She never clearly accepted me, but she also never gave me a direct rejection. She would always be kind, thankful and caring, but when it came to the question that mattered most, I never got clarity. I respected every boundary she had. I never forced calls, never tried to invade her personal space, and never expected anything in return for the support I gave. I helped her whenever I could because I genuinely wanted to. Recently, she resigned from the company. During her farewell week, I heard many stories from different colleagues about her farewell party, another colleague proposing to her, and other things. I honestly don't know what was true and what was gossip. I never confronted her because I didn't want my last conversation with her to be based on rumours. Instead, I sent her a final heartfelt message. I told her that I loved her without expecting anything back, that she should never feel guilty because of my feelings, and that I only wanted her to live happily. I also tried to tell her that if there was any truth she wanted to share, she didn't need to protect me with a carefully balanced reply. She never replied. Today, she's joined another company, and I've accepted that our chapter is probably over. The hardest part isn't that she may not have loved me back. The hardest part is not knowing whether I misunderstood everything for 2.5 years, or whether she cared but couldn't choose me. I'm not posting this to blame her. She had every right to choose the life and person she wanted. I just want to ask people who have been on either side of a situation like this: If you knew someone loved you deeply but you couldn't return those feelings, would you give them a clear answer, or would you choose silence? And for those who've been in my place... How do you make peace with never knowing the full truth?
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A very thorough gentleman u seem to be.Boundaries should be kept and maintained too from both sides .but emotions don't buy u bread. At times no closure in itself is a conclusion..Get practical to understand she moved on . If she felt an iota of sentiments she would not have left things hanging.She would have disclosed her future course of actions after a complete scrutiny as to where she sees things heading to. Rejection hurts irrespective of the gender.So emotional n luv sick people tend to bend and alter realities and await clarity when everything is darn crystal clear. Focus on career or hobbies or any other stuff other than entering/exiting relationships..Deserving half wud cross oceans to just hear u breathe.Spare yourself further agony Monsieur!🫡🫡
"respected every boundary she had, never expected anything in return for the support I gave, always helped her" Then you wonder why she never gave a proper reply to you? 🤣 You are right. You can't blame her, you can blame only urself. U were always ready to help her without expecting anything is the reason she never provided any clear answer bcoz she never wanted to lose you, what you can do for her. She was never ur friend either. You were just a useful chapter in her life and now that she is gone, why should she even reply you? Why should she even waste a single second or a single joule of energy on you? This is the full truth. Now cope and keep crying. Tabhi bolta hu accha aadmi and sutiya aadmi me difference hota h
Silence is an answer too. Learn to accept no and move on. You are overthinking it.
Just move on from her and walk away. You have confessed it and she hasn't valued it and accepted it. Wished her well like a gentleman and you are free now from this.
What was the question? Confessing own feelings is NOT a question. Did you 'ask' her – Do you love me? Will it be possible for you to love me in future? Can we date? Can we marry in future? --- If other person reciprocated same feelings they will say that. If they don't feel anything, they won't. They are just friendly colleagues.
She just considered you as one of her colleagues thats it. If she really considered you as her friend she would have told you whats in her mind.. but she didnt.. thats the place for you in her life.. its hard but accept the reality and move forward.
Her silence is the answer. When there's no clarity, always treat it as a No, no matter how friendly the other person seems. Some people like her either hesitate to be direct to avoid awkwardness or take advantage of another person's helpful nature. And sometimes, people like you miss the rejection hints repeatedly. Ideally, people should respond and give clarity instead of ignoring the message, but we don't live in an ideal world. No response is your closure. That's the truth of how she feels. Don't overthink it.
The question is did the confessor ever express his feelings to the lady? He assumed that whatever he did was love for him. But did she feel that the person was doing something out of love. People quit and change their jobs and this has got very little to do with attention from opposite sex. People change jobs for better salary and better opportunity. Confessor is trying to imagine things and want to become centre of attention. While she was in the organisation and confessor expressed his feelings yet the girl choose to ignore then this confession would have mattered. Next time please make things clear to the girl when you try to do things out of love
Buddy do you think she never know that you had feelings for her...bull shit man...she must know this from the beginning..but she had a no as the answer but don't want to loose the comfort u gave her..yes possibly she used u in whatever way possible... Now she is staying silent in guilt.. She feels like if I say No he might ask me more questions why u used me ....so she is staying silent... If you go back now and tell her sorry we will stay friends forget about what I asked ... Then she will reply back and will start using u again... Women's like the feeling that people should keep loving them ...but they only choose the person they like... It's complicated don't get used again...
For men even if a woman smiles at them , they think that she’s interested , NO SHES NOT . There is a difference between being close friends and being lovers . Even girls become close friends doesn’t mean they are lovers . You disappointed her , you shouldn’t have said anything to her about how you felt , you lost a good friends because of your stupidity and now get your act together and focus on your career .
Peaceful life is more important than complicated life... forget and move forward....
She took complete advantage of your innocence & generosity. You clearly told her you didn't want anything in return & made her feel free to enjoy your "help & kindness".
This is what happens when nerds gets to talk to a girl. 😂 - 23M
Move on. She never had feelings for you and maybe kept you around if she came to an existential crisis about never finding love.
She has n number of men around her like you. Why should she settle for you.
If u wouldn't have shared ur feelings to her, I.would have assumed u had mistaken her good behavior for love but no man u were clear- crystal clear. A decent soul would have stated her intention with you. But a devilish soul with damn good looks would stay silent and use u as per her convenience! That's whT exactly she did. And her sweetness inspite of her no clear ans should have been ur ans and if u had an ounce of common sense u would hv figured it all.out! But u were blind becoz of her beauty so there u go. Its not her fault,its ur fault. Ppl take advantage of u ,only if u let them. Move on n close this chapter forever.
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