Comments for Post #C27407

#C27407 M25 ,Banglore I am writing here because I genuinely need some advice. I have been emotionally attached to a girl since our school days. She was my crush back then, and even after all these years, I still have feelings for her. After 10th standard, we joined different colleges, so we were no longer in regular contact. During 11th standard, I proposed to her, but she said she wanted to focus on her career and was not ready for a relationship. She friend-zoned me. However, about a year later, I found out that she had started dating one of her college friends. Even then, I could not move on from her. Two years later, she broke up with him and contacted me again. She told me she missed me and wanted to meet me regularly. Hearing that made me emotional, and we started talking every day. Those were some of the happiest days for me. But after just three months, she fell in love with another college friend. Once again, I was hurt because I wanted to be more than just a friend to her. Over the years, we occasionally met and spent time together. Around three and a half years later, she broke up with that boyfriend as well. She told me he was toxic, manipulative, unsupportive, and had only used her. I felt bad for her and supported her through everything because I genuinely loved her. During these eight years, I was also in relationships with two other girls, but those relationships ended for different reasons. Meanwhile, I worked hard on myself, built my career, and reached a good position professionally. On the other hand, she has been preparing for govt exams and is still trying hard to secure a job. Now, she says she wants to marry me. She tells me that we have known each other since school, our vibe matches well, and I should reject all other proposals and marry only her. My family has shown me 4–5 girls for marriage, but she insists that I should choose her. However, about a month ago, I learned from some friends that she had gone on multiple 4–5 day trips, including overnight stays, with male friends. She had completely hidden this from me and lied about it. When I confronted her, she initially denied everything. Only after I told her that honesty was important if she truly wanted to marry me did she finally admit it. When I asked why she had hidden it, she said, "Tumko bura lagta aur tum bahot gussa hote." That incident broke my trust. What confuses me even more is that whenever she was in a relationship, she chose someone else over me. But whenever those relationships ended, she came back to me for emotional support. Now that I am well-settled in my career and earning well, she wants to marry me. Some of my friends believe she is manipulative , narcissistic and that she is choosing me because of my stability and financial situation rather than genuine love. They keep telling me that I deserve someone who values me from the beginning and that I can find a much better life partner. The problem is that I have liked her since school and have become emotionally attached to her over the years. A part of me still wants to marry her. But another part of me feels deeply hurt by her dishonesty and by the repeated pattern of her coming back into my life only after her relationships fail. I am confused between my emotions and my logic. Am I overthinking this situation, or are these genuine red flags that should not be ignored? Should I trust her and consider marriage, or should I move on and look for someone who chooses me first rather than as a backup option? Please give me Geniune advice