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Comments for Post #C27287
Submit ConfessionGender: Male6 June 2026 at 7:19 pm
#C27287 I am actually from Kolkata. I am 35 years old, married, and settled in Delhi. I have a son and a daughter. Many years ago, when I was in college, I fell deeply in love with the younger sister of our tenant's wife. Our relationship with the tenants was never like a typical landlord-tenant relationship. We lived like one family. In fact, we all used to have dinner together at the same dining table. My mother used to say that our tenant was like her eldest son. Whenever my tenant's wife's younger sister came to visit, I could not take my eyes off her. She was extraordinarily beautiful—fair, with large expressive eyes. One glance at her was never enough. Eventually, I went to her college and proposed to her. She did not give me an answer at that time, but through her elder sister the matter reached my mother's ears. Although my mother never said anything directly, problems started indirectly because we were Brahmins and our tenants belonged to the Kayastha community. One day, my tenant's wife, whom I used to call "Boudi," told me directly, "Don't you know that you are Brahmins? Your mother will never accept this relationship. Then why are you unnecessarily following my sister?" Even after that, I did not give up. Day after day, I stood outside her college waiting for her. One day she told me that she would agree to the relationship on one condition. Since my mother was against it, she wanted me to secure either a government job or a highly paid job so that I could stand on my own. But as a college student, it was impossible for me to achieve that so quickly. She was exceptionally beautiful, and after finishing college she got married into a well-established family. Later she had a son. Everything seemed normal, and with time I had forgotten everything and moved on with my life.Two weeks ago, I heard from my mother that her husband and in-laws had subjected her to terrible abuse for years. She had returned to her mother's house many times, but each time her mother persuaded her to go back and try once more, hoping things would improve. The last time, too, her mother sent her back saying, "Try one last time. Maybe things will get better." She truly made it her last attempt. She went up to the terrace, poured kerosene over herself, and set herself on fire. She survived in the hospital for three days in that condition, and then everything came to an end. I cannot accept that the woman I once loved so deeply reached such a tragic end because she could no longer endure the cruelty of her husband and in-laws. Today marks nineteen days since her death, and I still cannot believe it. Sometimes I wonder—if we had gone against everything and gotten married back then, perhaps she would still be alive today. Perhaps she would have been with me. Perhaps she would have been the mother of my children. I am unable to concentrate on anything. I find no peace. Sometimes I feel like leaving everything behind—my home, my job, everything—and just disappearing.
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Comments (100)
Long-term relationship success depends on character and mutual understanding rather than physical appearance. So you think you are lucky to have an understanding spouse. Forget your past & focus on your present life.
Grief has triggered you .. calm down .. she is gone...that's how life is .. remember you are father now .. let her go ...
Halka Mon – Your Safe Space To Be Heard
Such a rare kind empathetic soul u are god bless you and your family ur children .it's sad what happened to her ,but don't loose yourself with all the thoughts because now u have two little soul looking upto you u did nothing wrong she did nothing wrong too but sometimes we have to accept something which we can't control it's not in our hand ,but u can make things right and take control what's is in your hand and thats your family so take care of them and yourself too. Grief is a heavy emotion don't let it take over you.
May her soul rest in peace. Man proposes, God disposes. Everyone have their own destiny which is written by Almity when born. She came with so much life only with harrasment and abuses from husband, so things did not work with you. Since you had happiness in your married life Almity did not write her in your destiny. She is gone.. please move on..don't spoil happiness of your family life.. time will heal it.. Don't take wrong steps.. if you feel you are too depressed then take help of therapist.
Please reach out to a therapist who specializes in grief counselling or else you will end up having trauma for years . Lean onto spirituality . Truly sorry for what you are going through . Sending lots of love and prayers your way .
Her choice was wealth more than a person and she repaid for her choice.
She hasn't gone now. She left u years back. It was her destiny and supposedly to be happen. Her mother handled her daughter's issue so badly. May be bcoz they would've thought that she isn't interested to live bcoz of her past love. So its always better to not get deep into this. All u can feel bad for your love life. It will be okay soon
যেটা ঘটেছে সেটা নিঃসন্দেহে খুব বেদনাদায়ক। পড়ে আমারও খুব কষ্ট হয়েছে। কিন্তু আপনি এখন একজনের স্বামী,একজন বাবা! আপনার কষ্ট হতেই পারে। কিন্তু এইরকম ভাবাটা কী ঠিক??আপনার স্ত্রী জানতে পারলে তাঁর মানসিক অবস্থা ঠিক কি হতে পারে আপনি কি ভেবেছেন?? আপনার এই কনফেশনটি পড়ে আমার কোথাও মনে হল আপনি ওই ভদ্রমহিলাকে কোনদিন সেভাবে ভুলতেই পারেননি। সেক্ষেত্রে আপনি অন্য আর একজনকে বিয়ে করেছিলেন কেন???যাক্কে প্রশ্নবাণে জর্জরিত করা আমার উদ্দেশ্য নয়। বিয়ে আপনি যখন করেছেন, আপনার স্ত্রী সন্তানদের কথা ভুলবেন না দয়া করে।ভালো থাকার চেষ্টা করুন। ওনার আত্মার শান্তি কামনা করি।
don't get trapped in the "what ifs" of the past. What's done is done. Just move on, focus on the present, and make the most of the moment you have today. After all, life is lived forward, not backward.
Ami Gurgaon thaki...Bengali from Delhi dekhe porlam post ta...Amar mone hoy apnar nijer chele meye ar bou er dik e bhaba uchit tai na?...Je mara geche tar jonno pray korun jeno samner jibon e anek sukhi hoy meye ti..
May her soul rest in peace. She is gone. Your life has taken its own course, and you cannot do anything about it. But please leran from it, and pass it on to your kids. Never become a parent, as your or her mother are. Their stubbornness created all the mess in this whole incident. Only if the parents would have been a bit more sympathetic to their own kids.
People with extremely sensitive heart.... Feel everything for others.... There are some of us who are like you. This is nothing abnormal.this is actually called being human. Just pray for her soul..... Reality is .... U spoiling ur kids life for someone who has gone....... Help her kids if you think you have the mental strength ..... U both listened to family.we are in a culture where it has good outcomes and bad. Sometimes it's ok ,not to. To do the right thing.
Eveyone have their fair portion in her tragic death. Don't hold only you as accountable. - Your mother should have supported you and your feelings - her sister should have supported your both - the girl herself should have respected your feelings and stood by your side in everything. The precursor of govt job was unnecessary. She could have waited for you to be successful - her family should have supported you both - and at the last maybe you could have made few more sensible attempts instead of just standing outside the college Nobody can go in the past and change it. Endure the pain and give all the love to your current family. Take an oath that whom you are living with now, you'll give them all the love, respect and everything they should get.
Umm..how is your wife and children responsible for this tragedy? This kind of 'will leave everyone' thoughts are rather selfish at your age? You must be shocked and hurt that someone you loved deeply met such an unfortunate ending but each of us come with our fate. None of us can avoid that. I wish she used her education to get a job, become independent instead of being pushed back into an abusive marriage. This also opens up the pandora's box that across communities daughter-in-laws do get treated badly depending on the family she married into :( Please seek a good therapist; you do need to unburden yourself. And maybe when you feel better do something for women's shelters NGOs that help domestic abuse victims - start a scholarship or something in her name..that way she will remain as a positive ray of hope. May you heal and I hope her soul attains sadgati.
May her soul rest in peace. But u have other resp5 also...your wife is also a woman who committed to you and is raising your children..focus on her...few wounds are left open...they will heal with time.
Bangla tei bolchi. Ei situation er modhye diye je jay , sei sudhu bujhte parbe . Amra sudhu sympathy deoa chara Kichu parbo na. But Tao bolbo akhon apnaar Sathe aro 3 joner life jure ache. Tader Katha bhabtei hobe. Kichu korar nei. Darkar hole counselling koran. Family k niye ghure asun ei sob theke dure kothao. Baba maa R Sathe alochona Korte paren but please sob chere chole jaoar Katha bhabben na. Apni eka non. Ektu time din , present er opor focus korun. Apni joto ta perechen korechen. Nijeke ajotha Dosh Deben na. Bhalo thakun family k niye.
Our days no mobile, bit hard to connect like this, so lots of loves failed. But they -boy or girl are still in our heart.. true love will be ther in heart till last breath.
There's something called Destiny. You can't change it. Accept it and forget it.
Remember the word "Perhaps" . That defines everything....
You have to move on. It was her destiny. Nothing you can do about it. You proposed several times, they did not accept you. This was your past, not present. Think about your kids & try to forget everything. That is best for you.
The women you married the kids you are having with her is your family .. accept it and leave it on God to take the Karma forward.. if you still feel distracted and heartbroken it’s not fair for your family.. they love you and their world comes alive with you so you have responsibilities towards them.. right? Move on and stay happy with your family 🙏🏻Radhe Radhe
May her soul rest in peace. What was written indicated that you liked her, but there was no mention of your relationship. Was it two-way? We do not need to know. Ask yourself. Yes or no, she is not going back, and that is a fact. Now ask yourself if you are giving to your partner and treating her correctly. If you answered yes, you're on the correct track. Finally, you have children. They will eventually settle. Try to be a good parent to them so they don't have to go through what you did.
It's sad situation she endured but it wasn't in your fate for her married to you .
It's not author's fault. It's fault of parents of that lady.
Just focus on your beautiful family mother & your wife... Who stood by you when you are alone.... Don't create unnessary problems in life by overthinking
You are depressed allready, omg...pain, sorrow, condolences, suffering are okay, as this shall pass, but what's not okay is depression. It can take two lives now.
Its deeply heartbreaking. ... but pls remember you are not responsible for her death. It was the societal pressure and her depression. Please concentrate on praying for her soul and take care of your wife children. Teach your son to support and treat his wife with respect whereas your daughter that whatever happens you've got her back.
Don't blame yourself for things that are not under your control..move on..you have a family depending on you..
I know the trauma from your past relationship and the anger over how parents used to destroy lives over caste runs incredibly deep. It’s a heavy burden, but you cannot let it consume you. Remember who you are today: you are a husband and a father. By letting this past trauma take over, you are doing a massive injustice to your wife and your child. What is their fault in any of this? They are completely innocent. You need to ground yourself right now. Please consider talking to a professional to help you process and heal from this baggage once and for all. Do it for yourself, and do it for them. All the best.
If you feel so much, then do charity in her name. Or join an ngo, help people who are suffering in abusive marriages
We can't expect what will happen in life? May be same thing or different thing may happen if you both marry as your marriage is also against your family will...so whatever happened is happened, leave it and move on...you have your life and family...
This is how life goes young man. You have profound grief but she is gone. Move on
Great that you have so much empathy for her … you can take a vacation and express your grief and try to move on from this. But when you come back home, please focus on your current family. Don’t let this linger in your mind. It’ll complicate your present situation which is unfair to your wife.
First time I am commenting here because of this traumatic experience of yours , unfortunately it must not have been , please take care of yourself and the thought that you're going through is true if you would have taken steps then today this has not happened, it's very true that casteism is a bitter truth of our society but Love has immense power , I can say this because I too have married with my classmate (intercaste), situation was against but we were adamant and with blessings of our parents we did and today we are very happy together. Yours pain is unbearable even everyone will feel this but today you have not any option left , so please understand and recollect and pardon yourself, May Almighty give you strength to bear all these pain.
Life is like this dear. We wish for something and fate will do something else. Your thoughts will be heard by her soul. You wish her soul peace and rest. You conduct pooja for her .! You are a gem of men.
Let her rest in peace, now you don't ponder over things which are your past. She chose the life she wants and it ended in a tragic way. You please concentrate on your life, there are no "if" In the present life, just concentrate on your family and move on.
Am sure that you do not believe in destiny for had you believed then you would've known that both of you were not destined to be together; that she was never meant for you or to be with you; you ought to accept this hard and bitter reality; sad but true.
Don't worry brother, sometimes it's karmic destiny of someone is in such a way that you cannot save them. It's tragic, but you can't do anything about it, let it go.
It was never US it was always YOU. Calm down and move on.
The love you have is all left with you, love is what gives you this pain, just pray to almighty for peace and move on with your life, meditation will help you, do things that you like and just try to get over it, this may take time but you have a life of your own, just pray for the departed soul and let the grief pass slowly
May her soul rest in peace. It's grief. Cry your heart out. seek a therapist. Try to lighten the burden that's there in your heart. It was not your fault nor its the fault of your wife and kids. It's just destiny. But don't abandon your family. Let's pray wherever she's born, she gets a great life.
Its too late to think this as person is. Gone maybe you need to move on
আমি জানি না তুমি কে দাদা.. বলবো তোমার মানবিকতা বোধ আর ভাবনা অনেক উচ্চ আমার বিশ্বাস তোমার স্ত্রী এবং ছেলে মেয়ে তোমাকে পেয়ে খুব ভাগ্যবান বোধ করে কারণ মানুষ হিসেবে সত্যি তুমি খুব ভালো আজ তোমার যেটা বোধ হচ্ছে সেটা বিবেকবান,উদার মানসিকতার পরিচয়.. তবে বর্তমানে যেটা ঘটেছে তাতে তোমার কোনো হাত নেই,তাই এতো কষ্ট পেয়ো না, পরিবার নিয়ে ভালো থেকো
I can’t imagine what kind of abuse she would have endured to meet such a fate! If she had chosen to burn herself im so hurt to think that she would have endured much worst than that😭 I imagined a beautiful Bengali girl from your description about her and also imagined her condition at hospital!!! Now I’m traumatised! May her soul rest in peace! No girl should endure whatever she went through🙏🏼
Na dada...apni biye korle apnarao torture korten. Ei obostha na holeo uni bhalo thakten na. Ei 2026 e eseo jaat paat niye ki sundor likhchen lojjao nei abar nakey kanna....chi chi. Onar atmar shanti kamona kori. Kintu apni kiser jonyo ki confess korchen apni e janen. Jan giye nijer brahmin bou er kache, bhule jan je chole geche takey. A close relative of mine has met the same fate 30 years back. It's so disheartening to see nothing has changed. That woman in pain 30 years back chose the same way to escape...we have failed our women. More than the in laws, the parents of the woman are culprits. Why would you ask any human to adjust with abuse? They should be in jail too. And this guy confessing this is no less, in 2026, he is still in brahmin kayastha mode. If he has gone against his mother and married this girl, they'd have tortured her too. Girls should just get independent and stay alone instead of marrying these bas@ards.
Sometimes our mothers just don't come out of the fact that we are not just their sons but we hold our own individuality our own choice , likes and dislikes. Although that lady should have stood by your side , she should have given you time. She chose her comfort and it was her fate. You should feel the pain but leave it and move on
I guess the script is well written. Half the stories posted here are not real. In last 1 month there is no such incident reported any where in news. If something this big happens it always catches media attention. Lets assume its true, she is dead and if you really feel that frustrated atleast you could have posted any news link or name or where this incident happened. Just incase her husband was supressing the news from spreading you could expose them and make them face law and also you have power to save some other girl, whom that fellow is gonna marry in future. Out of all these options you thought venting out annonymously is the best way to express your grief. And looking at your repeated use of the word beautiful, looks like you were chasing her, stalking her and doing whatsoever it takes to win her beauty. And logically speaking why would she ask you to get govt job when you are in college? I mean her IQ was dead to figure out that much? I don’t think so. That condition of getting job itself makes no sense tbh. If your mother was against your marriage, there are 2 options 1. Elope and get married 2. Convince and get married. I am sure she has normal brain, so she must have asked you to get a good job, did you fail to get that? Ahh poor guy couldn’t even work hard to secure a job to win love. Or its nothing about job or anything, you probably just surrendered to your mom because you were just a college student. People write so many cooked up stories here ugh. Anyways, lets assume your story is real and you still failed brother. You missed either getting a job or convincing your parents at the beginning and at the end you still not doing anything when you have capacity to expose that husband who is reason for her death. Keep venting!
Accept the god's plan.it is better for you.
May her soul rest in peace. In the whole statement, you clearly explained that you were only attracted to her because she was exceptionally beautiful. Even when she agreed to marry you on one condition, your statement shows you lacked the ambition to secure a job. Try to focus on your life. You are not the one to be blamed for her death.
Maybe in some other lifetime...stay blessed.
BROTHER. THIS IS CALLED MARANA VAIRAGYA. death shows the reality of life. Stay calm. focus on ur job, be happy with ur family. She still lives and no one dies. it's just that she has given up her current body.
It's not entirely your fault but I wish people would have risen against old traditions and be more modern. If your mother would have accepted the match may be something else would have happened.
May her soul rest in peace. OM Shanti 🙏 Things happen brother but you have to be strong as you have a family now. Life must go on and I will pray you will pass this one as well. Always remember you are a good Soul and God is always with good people 🙂
Dont make yourself feel guilty. It was her call absolutely when you proposed and She gave you a condition. She chose her destiny herself. You loved her, proposed her and then nothing was at your control at that point of time. Deserting your own father, mother and all relation for a beautiful lady who puts up a condition in relationship which usually comes with no condition is absolutely pre destined process. Have mental peace, and I assure you of one fact, every soul is on its own journey, you are never so powerful to rewrite that destiny.
Don't be emotional.apni biwi p dhyan do use pata lag gaya to tumhari jindagi kharab ho jayegi
If yur wife did that what would you say?? If yur wife loved her tenant's wife's younger brother?? Wake up! The other one did not choose you. You now have a wife who is yur present! Stop living in whats ifs etc. The past is past.
May her soul rest in peace. 🙏🏻🙏🏻 You have a family now. Please take care of them and move on with your life.
It's ok to grieve. But make sure you don't lose yourself in the process. This was probably how her life was destined to end. It would have happened even if you had married her. Imagine, that. This woman whom you loved so much giving up her life for you. So accept what has happened has happened and move on with your life.
I get that you loved her so much and her untimely demise with such conditions has triggerd you a lot. But what about your wife and kids. They didn't had any fault so why are thinking of this what ifs. If you have truly madly loved her you would have fought more harder. But now when she is not here you are griefing and that is okay but thinking what would have Happend if she married you or she was the mother of your children. Isn't it wrong for you to think of it now when you have a wife who loves you and gave you two beautiful children.
Hoping that you both will be extremely happy together in another lifetime. I don't have any other words to express myself
May the Devine soul rest in peace 🙏 try to do something for her son. God bless you with the strength to move on and perform your responsibilities.
What about your wife?????
You never honestly loved her. You had moved on. In fact, you were lazy in your so called obsession - what was she as a person? What forced her into that marriage? She did have hopes on you, that is why she asked you to get a govt job, settle down - but you didn't. You let things pass. The only thing you seem to obsess about is her good looks - what did her heart crave for? Did you ever ask? You resigned yourself to the thought of her being married to someone else, you knew she was not happy in her marriage and you did nothing - now why try to convince yourself that you miss her? You actually don't, it is just the guilt of it all creeping into your mind.
🥺🥺 Sir but you're father now n have responsibilities, family so please be happy n live a good life 🥺🥺
See, even when she said that she only wanted a govt job or high end job, see many men and women only look money ... If she would have said a simple job and she will wait things could have improved a lot. When we go behind money only pain follows
Focus on your family and child.. there is nothing more important than that
Condolences, friend. 🫂
Oh god. So sad. But u need to manage yourself. Take time. And it was written in her destiny. So just pray for her soul.
Dada Don't think too much.Think about the good memories which you have with her.Baas. u guys were not meant to be together that is why you are where you should be. Love only gives you grief.
It was never your war to fight, brother. You have an amazing capacity for love and empathy. Pour that into your own family. What ifs of past will never let you sleep. Let that go.
She hadn't chosen you , she chose her destiny on her own by setting an income priority to have a partner ! Take control of yourself on your own hand ! Be a man and you know what : Men are brave ! Men are here to conquer!
Seems it was an one sided feeling, the way you felt for her, she didn’t had same feeling for you in those days. Thus she made an excuses or gave you condition for a good govt job. But anyway there is no point of discussion, whatever happened its just destiny. You can’t bring back the gone days. Pray for the departed soul and move ahead with your present life.
This is called true love. Om Shanti to d departed soul 🙏
People often fail to choose the right one. It's better to give Love to the person who actually loves you. Caste , creed etc. never matter in Love when both remain dedicated to one another even through the phases with turbulence. It's a pain to see her like this definitely but now you have your partner , your kids , you should not disappoint them. They are your World now.
Even i am disturbed hearing this😩
So sad. Praying for peace for her family and for you. May her soul rest in peace.
U r married . MARRIED!!! U have a wife , two kids!!! And u r still hung up on a past illusion of love and want to leave everyone because u r hurting over an incident that has happened to a person u once upon a time loved???? Feel sad. Express sorrow. Share your sadness with your wife. But please don’t tarnish the institution of marriage . Otherwise there is no difference between what her husband did to her and what you are doing to your wife. There’s was more explicit yours is hidden. Just that!! Past relationship is in the past. Please do not go overboard with that. U have all rights to feel sadness but your emotional loyalty lies with your wife. Period!!
Brother get out of this soon. Think about your wife waiting for you at home unaware that her husband is grieving for someone from the past. Trust me women are really jealous beings, especially 'the wife' . There is no point of destroying your current peace and happiness for something that didn't happen. Focus on the beautiful present you have. Take care
Caste er achar baniye or chitay dhele dish. Jottosob!
I understand your pain, and I can see how deeply this has affected you. But one thing you need to remember is that you are now a husband and a father. You also have responsibilities towards your wife and children. Cheating is not always physical; sometimes holding on to someone emotionally and living in the past can also hurt the person who is with you today. It is natural to grieve for someone you once loved, but please don’t let that grief make you lose the family you have now. If you truly want to honour the person you loved, try to turn that pain into something meaningful. Work towards creating awareness so that no one else has to suffer domestic violence like she did. Teach your children the importance of respect, kindness, and healthy relationships. The past cannot be changed, but you can still make the future better. And you have only kept talking about her external beauty — how beautiful she was and all that. Is love possible only through beauty? Do you even understand what love means? Please remove the thoughts of leaving your wife and child from your mind. Just think — if someone like this existed in your wife’s life and she thought this way, how would you feel? Or if your own father had thought like this, how would it have affected you? Please let go of these thoughts and move forward with your own life.
It happens, but you are not responsible, she made her choice, not you..she looked for riches.. she got richly treated
You said with time i have forgotten everything and moved ahead ! This is what is required now. Times heals. So take a day at a time. She is gone will not return. Keep her memories and stay happy. You also need a therapist. Pl condult one immediately and understand the value of your persent and future!
Feel bad for your current wife.. she doesn't know that her marriage is a sham..
deepest condolences. so sad that she died in a terrible way. Forgive yourself and others and move on
Make some charity in her name and that's true love. May lord rest her soul in peace.
irukartha vitutu, parakarthuku aasa pata ipitha aagum kumaru!! nee un velaya paaru...
This is natural..all these years u were not disturbed because u thought she was leading a peaceful life happy and contented like urs.its so good u never tried to interfere in her life neither did she..now since she is gone ,I can understand that u are even unable to express ur grief..do some holy rituals as per ur believe, let her soul free,just pray for her and cry ur heart out...it will work ..and i think u need not say anything to ur wife.she might not feel ok wd it.. God bless and remember time heals everything.
Just yesterday I heard same story about an extraordinary beautiful female who died due to burnt (& everything u mentioned matching exactly with her) she got married at 19-20 and her beauty bcm the reason of her death, her husband tortured/abused her regularly if anyone compliments her, btw as I heard her husband was the one who burnt her so that she can't be beautiful anymore. In her mayka noone ever think about her. We'll are in shock. As we were hearing her story from decades 😢
You tried your best, but it was her destiny created by God, better to forget everything.
May be, she needed that govt job more than you.
Har kisi ko nh milta yaha pyar zindagi me.. dost I know the pain of na mila pyar.
We Indians don't speak about real problems. Here caste is the only intangible barrier for the confessor. He could have broken the system easily for his love. But now his condition is seriously pathetic!
Jiski kismat bhai , even i loved a girl now she is divorced and im happily married with 3 kids
May her soul rest in peace
Her mother is the main culprit
इस जीवन में सबको सबकुछ नही मिल पाता मेरे दोस्त इस लिए जाने दो
Sending prayers to her soul and sending courage, love and strength to you! ❤️ You are a kind person.
You have a lovely family. You wrote you have moved on but did you actually? Your wife is not at fault in this case right? So be fair to her at least. Who has gone, has gone no matter how painful it is. You will find peace and strength soon just don't act stupid meanwhile.
it is not u who did this, it is her decision wat made this happen...so do not feel guilty, you may feel pity not guilty so move on and take care of ur family first
She is gone now, just pray god that let her soul rest in peace, you are father and husband, concentrate on your family.