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Comments for Post #C27267
Submit ConfessionGender: Female5 June 2026 at 2:20 pm
#C27267 Hi I am f29 and my bf who is m26 and is my colleague. Before me he had another relationship, whom he found on tinder and that relationship stayed for 1.5 year. Then they broke up. She had anger issues and that's what he told the reason for their break up. It has been 2 years since they broke up but he still use statements as such "when it was my first date, we went ...", And praise her alot tho what my bf explained was she was a complete dumb and problematic person with lots disease. We are in relationship for more than an year but an month ago his ex called her and asked for his whereabouts and he was happily talking to her. She told him she got TB and would die soon, he told me that he believed her and asked her whereabouts too and showed her care as if he still loves her. I mean you guys got broke up 2years ago why suddenly all this care and attention is needed. So they spoke on call for 47mins straight. Surprisingly, I have asked him to join me for lunch during the same time and he didn't appear so i left for lunch and assumed he must have gotten some urgent work. I called him after 25mins and his number was busy, i still assumed he musting talking to someone important that he chose to avoid me for that moment. After 35mins i again called him and then he picked the call. I ASKED him where are you and why are you not coming. He said he is on call with His ex. I couldn't believe it because why would somebody talk to their ex at the cost of making your own partner wait. I asked him why and what his talking. I got too anxious and asked him to come over and then I hung up but he resumed the call with his ex. After a while I again called and he was still on call with her as his number was busy, this time I shouted on him for doing so and hang up. He still resumed the call with her 😞 I know I am looking stupid doing this but I love this guy so much and i got too scared what's going on. On third call he said he would hang up and come and he did. And then after meeting me he told me what they talk about. He told me that he wanted to give her a closure because they ended really bad. I confronted him what kind of closure and why you had never told me your need of giving your ex a CLOSURE? From that day itself nothing is going well from my side. I am very disappointed from this action. I have tried to let go of this thing but it is more than a month and nothing changed and thinge have gotten worst in my head. It is me only who tries to discuss and close it but he keeps on saying "it's not that big, i know did wrong, i am sorry, give me second chance, i promise i will not repeat it" I just wanted to vent out. I have nobody to talk about thjs, i thought to take help from a psychologist, i will probably see it if i still feel the same. Eveytime i confronted him, i keep on asking him the same question but either he said random reasons or simply stays quite. I have gathered the courage to face the reality. Please let me if i was wrong anywhere. All i wanted was him to be honest and keep thing transparent but he chose himself. Eveytime i confronted him, i keep on asking him the same question but either he said random reasons or simply stays quite. 1. He had all the possibility to come and talk in front of me but he chose to be alone. 2. He could have hang up the call instead of talking to her for 47mins. 3. He could have told me that he had something to talk to his ex in the name of closure we would have spoke about it at first place. 4. He could have called me back but chose to continue talking to her. You may also suggest what should i do at this point, i feel i am spiralled in it. Thank you for reading, hope you have a wonderful day ahead. Ps sorry for broken English, i am 5% autistic.
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Comments (9)
I don't know what to tell you ,but I can feel you ,I been through such situation and place in my life ,and trust me what your gut trying to tell ,listen to it , don't make a fool out of yourself,when someone prioritising someone else feelings ,not you then that's your answer . I suggest don't do anything,just stay quiet and let them run the circus ,and slowly detach yourself and get away from this . I know it won't be easy but if you stay and try to solve everything,it's going to hurt you more and keep you in unnecessary shit .so as an adult you better know what to do . I hope you have a good day too and good future ahead . 😌 Sorry for broken english.
मैडम, आप ऐसा करो कि आप उसको cheat कर दो। फिर mutual guilt एक-दूसरे को nullify कर देगा। जैसे दो negatives multiply कर के positive बन जाते हैं।
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First, I don't think you're wrong for feeling hurt. The issue is not simply that your boyfriend spoke to his ex. Many people can have occasional contact with an ex without it meaning they want to get back together. The problem is the way he handled the situation. From what you've described, he knew you were expecting him for lunch, chose to spend 47 minutes on the phone with his ex, continued the conversation after you called multiple times, and only came to see you after the third call. That's understandably upsetting because it sends the message that your feelings and your time were not his priority in that moment. I also think your concerns are bigger than the phone call itself. It sounds like you've been trying for a month to understand what happened and why it happened, but instead of having a meaningful conversation, you're getting short answers such as "I know I was wrong" and "It won't happen again." An apology can help, but it doesn't answer the underlying question you're struggling with, why was talking to his ex so important that he ignored you repeatedly? That said, I would be careful about assuming that he still loves her. The fact that he showed concern after hearing she might be seriously ill does not automatically mean he has romantic feelings. Most people would show concern for someone they once cared about, even years later. The stronger concern here is the lack of transparency and boundaries, not necessarily the existence of the call itself. I think your four points are reasonable: 1. He could have informed you what was happening. 2. He could have called you back sooner. 3. He could have discussed any need for "closure" beforehand. 4. He could have prioritized responding when he knew you were waiting. Where I think you may be getting stuck is trying to find the perfect explanation that will make the hurt disappear. Sometimes there isn't a satisfying answer. Sometimes the answer is simply that someone made a poor decision in the moment. At this point, instead of repeatedly asking why, I would ask yourself a different question, has his behavior since then rebuilt your trust? Has he become more transparent, more considerate, and more willing to discuss difficult topics? If the answer is yes, then this may be a relationship issue that can be worked through. If the answer is no, and you're still carrying the entire burden of resolving it while he avoids the conversation, then that's a larger problem than one phone call. A psychologist could absolutely help, not because you're wrong, but because you've been stuck in a cycle of rumination for over a month and it's clearly causing you distress. Your feelings are valid. Whether this relationship moves forward will depend less on what happened during those 47 minutes and more on whether your boyfriend is willing to genuinely address the damage to trust that those 47 minutes created.
First of all there is nothing called 5 percent austistic .. Either one is mild autistic or Full austism.. Secondly you may have disgraphia which is neurological disorder or specific learning disability .. autism is also neuro developments disorder
Don't leave your bf because of his ex,by your statement his ex believes to be a psychopath,try to understand the heart of your bf and never leaves him
If you constantly talk to him on the same topic, he will definitely not be appreciative of it. That is why he keeps giving you vague and evasive answers. My gut feeling is that you are very insecure in this relationship because he is younger than you. Be confident of yourself- if this relationship has to last, it will, otherwise it was never meant to be.
No one is going to talk to his/ her ex in front of their present partner. Its nothing to worry about. If you feel he is a genuine person and loves you, continue with your relationship witbout being too fussy about a minor thing.
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