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Comments for Post #C27178
Submit ConfessionGender: Female27 May 2026 at 4:19 pm
#C27178 I need serious suggestions. F35, married, earning 18 LPA. Husband M37, earning 12 LPA. We had a love marriage after dating for 2 years, mostly long distance because of jobs. We have been married for 5 years and have a daughter. I got pregnant soon after marriage, so I couldn’t take a transfer near him. When my daughter turned 2, my husband got transferred closer to me, though his posting was still around 200 km away. Things were mostly fine between us until last year (2025), when he got involved with a woman from his office. After that, he started becoming distant and emotionally cold. Whenever I asked what was wrong, he would say things like: “I don’t want to stay with you anymore.” “I’ve lost interest in you.” I used to cry a lot and kept trying to save the marriage. Later I found out he was having an affair and had even gone on trips with her multiple times for 4–5 days. When I confronted him and requested him to think about our daughter and our marriage, he still continued the affair. This all started around April 2025. In August 2025, I filed a complaint at head office because they worked together, and he got transferred around 500 km away. But even after the transfer, he continued the relationship and travelled almost every week to meet her. This year, he took a transfer to his hometown and told me he wanted to “fix things,” so I hoped maybe things could improve. But whenever I ask about the other woman, he says: “I’ll leave her slowly.” “I’ll do it when I feel like it, not because you’re asking.” This leads to constant fights, and he keeps ignoring me emotionally. I have now stopped contacting him, but mentally I am struggling a lot. Everyone around me says: “Take divorce and move on.” But honestly, I feel like if divorce happens, he will move on happily while I will remain emotionally stuck and broken. I know many people will say “have self-respect,” but I genuinely feel emotionally trapped in this cycle. Even after everything, a part of me still hopes things will become normal again, and that hope is destroying me from inside. I feel like I’ve completely lost my self-respect trying to save this marriage. How do I emotionally come out of this cycle? Has anyone gone through something similar and healed from it?
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Comments (46)
You fear he’ll be happy after a divorce while you fall apart. But the truth is, he’s already having fun with that woman, and you’re already hurting. “Leaving slowly” doesn’t exist. Walk away before he does.
Once it's other woman entry in your married life, it's difficult to save marriage, as your husband is fond of her. You have tried your best to save marriage but couldn't. Now only separation else live life as it is. Life is for living happily. Think about your daughter's future. Since you are earning, you can take care of both...Move on.
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I don't think anyone ever actually "heals" from anything. Yes, time dims the memories attached to people you were close to at some point time. And, you will have to deal with this harsh fact too. He won't change. I don't see any chance there. When this other woman is gone, there will be another, and another, and another. Neither does your husband have any self-respect, nor do these other women. You will end up suffering your entire life because of this one lousy man. So, chin up and move on. Get that divorce.
Mam , You are confessing at wrong place.... you will get 1000 solutions from different people because its human tendency that there are 100 solution of any problem only condition woh problem apni nahi honi chahiye... So listen to your heart aap wahan khud face kar rahe ho har cheez so step bhi apka hona chahiye... No one can understand ur pain better than YOU
Take time that man is a jerk and cheater and don't worry he will get his karma on the other hand you please take care of yourself and the child. You should focus on your self growth and mental peace now and believe me after 1 year you will say thank you God I got saved🧿
Practically speaking, don’t take divorce from your side. Yes, you may seek and get child maintenance and custody through the court, but such matters can take years and many hearings. It seems distance has created the current situation. Give him some time. Ask your daughter to call him and encourage him to meet. Try to remind him of the old days. Once you file, everything changes. I agree it may satisfy your self-respect for some time, but in the long run it may hurt more than you expect. Think thrice before taking the final step.
Being emotionally stuck is your individual problem.Take a lesson and get out of it as early as possible.He is eitherways not giving anything to the relationship except mental stress and lack of clarity.Why you have to be so dumb emotionally.Don’t get played for emotions.Be practical and prefer mental peace. And yes!things don’t change.You will only lose your valuable time and energy for such ungrateful person.Better protect your mental health,peace and sanity
Pls try staying to together tht will improve ur relationship
I know this will sound harsh, but someone needs to say it. Your husband is not keeping you trapped. Your hope is. He has cheated, lied, travelled to be with another woman, and continues to tell you that he will leave her only when he feels like it. What more proof are you waiting for? You earn well, you are educated, and you are raising a daughter. Yet you are acting as if your life depends on a man who has repeatedly shown you that you are no longer his priority. Self respect is not a quote for social media. It is the ability to walk away from what keeps hurting you. Maybe the question is not whether he will change. Maybe the question is why you keep choosing someone who has already stopped choosing you. The day you stop waiting for him to come back is the day your healing begins.
He cheated you so what makes you feel that he will move ahead peacefully? I have seen cases where after divorce the person who was in to affairs got destroyed in life. You better get divorce from him and leave him at the mercy of KARMA to catch up with him. If you believe in God go to any Shani temple and tell karmic chief justice to do the needful and bring it in front of you at some point of time of life's journey. 😀
U r in delusion nothing will happen let that man be happy with that girl. For u mental peace and ur daughter is important. Leave that man focus on ur self and ur daughter u will heal not immediately but definitely.
Honestly you really can't stay with a man who is cheating with another woman. He is very happy and you are the one who is suffering. Tbh he will definitely leave you very soon. Before he takes a move be prepared physically and mentally. Yeah I understand divorce is very hard but staying with the wrong person is much harder than divorce. Think and decide
Take divorce with good alimony, he will provide money for children, 12 lpa kama kr alimony de kr firse affair kr hi nh payega 😂
it will be painful process in beginning but people are suggesting you right..otherwise you will get trapped to it dipper..may be with your kid growing..it will become easy to move on gradually
Let me tell you something, once a cheater ,always a cheater. If he has cheated once he'll cheat again, with someone else. Rest is upto you
Don't give divorce. Let him suffer also.. He cannot continue this illicit relationship very long
No words. Girls are always emotionally stucked and men aren't. But trust me u ll feel happy after a certain time. Pls think about ur daughter. She needs healthy atmosphere and present father
Order him the heavy alimony through court. He himself wont hv money to spend on tht women eventually she will also leave him.
Continuing in this marriage will also effect your daughter.Think about it.you are financially independent. Move on .its a wasteful marriage. When one door closes other opens.all the best to you
Time to gather evidence and file a divorce case and get maintenance for the daughter.. it won't work and he's a cheater..
Time is answer .. If he has asked for divorce that shows he has no emotions or bonding for you .. But question to be asked whether he has fatherly emotions for the Child .. If he has no emotions for the Child too , then no point living in such conditions .. You are financially independent woman .. If you take step of divorce Then Court will give the Child support that's not problem .. Ofcourse with new laws in place , Court will allow Alimony even if you are financially independent.. So choice is yours .. You wanna live in burden of lost love and broken marriage that's ur choice . But Time heals every thing .
I’m really sorry you’re going through this. What stood out to me is that you’re not struggling because you still love him—you’re struggling because you’re still holding on to hope. And hope can become painful when it keeps us waiting for someone who has repeatedly shown us, through actions, that they are not choosing the relationship. For more than a year, your husband has not just had an affair; he has continued it despite knowing how deeply it hurts you, despite your efforts, and despite having opportunities to end it. His words say “I’ll leave her slowly,” but his actions suggest he is keeping both relationships alive on his own terms. The hardest truth is that you cannot save a marriage alone. One person can fight for a marriage, but two people are required to rebuild one. Please don't think that divorce automatically means he will be happy and you will be broken forever. Right now, you are already carrying the pain, uncertainty, rejection, and loneliness while still being married. The question isn't only whether to stay or leave; it's whether this situation is allowing you to heal at all. You don't need to make a divorce decision today. But you do need to start shifting your focus from "How do I get him back?" to "How do I get myself back?" Consider individual therapy if possible. Build emotional support outside the marriage. Focus on your daughter, your career, your financial independence, your friendships, and your own mental health. Even if the marriage survives, you'll need your strength back. And if it doesn't, you'll need that strength even more. Many people have healed from situations like this—not because they stopped loving overnight, but because they gradually accepted reality instead of waiting for a different one. You deserve a partner who chooses you willingly, not someone you have to convince to stay. Take care of yourself. You've spent a long time fighting for the marriage. It's okay to start fighting for your own peace now.
Girl you are earning pretty well to raise your child n get good life come on leave him. he knows ur dependent emotionally so he is doing purposely the moment you ll leave him he ll be restless think of your daughter she needs good environment
Take a divorce, as simple as that. You can never fix him as he is continuing the affair and has still not realised his wrong. What's the point of staying where there's no love? And you should claim child maintenance, as it's not yours alone, he has some responsibilities too.
The thought of them to move on happily is so real but you know this is not at all fair for you and your daughter and it might not be as great for him as you think, somethings gonna hit him for his indolence, for sure! Must be so difficult to decide whats best, but I feel once you move on after divorcing him will be 1000% relief then feeling unwanted, maybe there will be phases when u’d wish u’d not taken that path n it is what it is, once you accept and move on it will all make sense and you even earn more than him. Do even better, your daughter needs to be out of this mess!
Gone through this.
Sue him
Just relax! Keep patience and focus on daughter care! He is far away and he got bored in this relation! However your story is one sided and the other side story is still unknown to us! You know better than anyone regarding what to do in future! Sometime happiness starts with a string decision and you know what decision you have to take
It's due to the 'fear of unknown' you are clinging to him. What if....this happens, what if.....that happens. And It's a genuine fear. Sometimes the mind keeps us 'in hope' due to this fear. People find known hell better than unknown heaven. Sit with yourself and ask from your own self, few questions about the situation. Do you genuinely feel things will improve or it's just your mind keeping you trapped? Are you scared that you have to take care of your daughter all by yourself? Are you scared what will people think and say? Are you scared that you will have to be by yourself all your life? Do you think you are too weak to handle all this? ....And many more. Write them down. Write the answers as well if possible. Take your time. Think in terms of what's the worst possible that can happen? You will get your answer about your steps forward. All the best. PS: you need guidance and little hand holding of someone wise or a genuine psychotherapist.
Just make up your mind and visit a divorce lawyer ASAP
U should also Start Affair With any Men then he will Understand apke paas koi aur Option to bcha nhi hai waise bhi
Police complaint! He should loose his job , respect , peace for his dishonesty
I think your first mistake is having a long distance relationship. Most of them ends at illicit relationships. If you want to continue in your marriage life, 1. Both of you shift to same place. 2. All your saved money so far keep them safe for you and your kid. 3. After you both started staying at same place, things will change definitely.
Contact an Occultist and fix this thing. You know what I mean
Divorce, can't force these people
Aap ye mt socho wo khush ho jaega. Aap apna socho . Atleast aapko mental peace milega. Kisi ka thoda sa milne se behtar hai usko poora kho dena
come to pune u need healing
Talk to him what he want give him don't take divorce
Inbox me if you can.
You are in syndrom of "What if" Trust me, divorced or not divorced, he is enjoying life at fullest. With a family and a woman around, so if you still feel that in case he comes to you and remain with you, this is not going to happen ever, he is gone now, and will never come back. So just take a bitter pill and atleast think about your child, what will the effect his father will have on her in future, when she able to understand everything.
Just imagine this kind of condition to a King in previous Era which so many wives! 🤣
If you continue with this man.... Surely you will get into depression, please divorce & move on . To overcome mentally Do some meditation & plan for your child future & your career... Think of getting more stronger financially & Mentally.... So that your man should feel his guilty
Relationship now a days are untrustable.
He's just gone bro. There is nothing to feel emotional for a bastar* who doesn't reciprocate the same. Divorce him and Live happily with ur child.
Worse part is yours was love marriage, being in second women's place isn't better now a days
boys like him deserves to fit in Blue drum You married a guy who earns almost 45-50% less thn you which is quite unusual And still he has guts to involve with other women..... Shame You deserve bettr girl don't be an option for him File divorce case and file as much as cases possible and take alimony and live your life.