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Comments for Post #C27147
Submit ConfessionGender: Female24 May 2026 at 3:44 am
#C27147 Hi I'm 26, He is 31. He works as a Manager at a Government bank and I'm also doing a good job but still left with to settle down in my career. We both come from different castes, still we gathered courage to love each other and worked out to convince hiboth of our families. Since he is working at a very good post, he got a lot of wedding rishtaa with pretty decent amount of.dpwry proposals. So his family expectations were really high. On the other hand I come from a family where such things are not normalised. He struggled a lot and convinced his family to not ask for too much of dowry, but still he thinks there should be some cashgivings as they need to show their relatives and society that this is what they have got from the girl's side. They are ready to give me amole amount of gold and is ready to share half of the the expenses of engagement. While wedding is supposed to be done from my side. So hai family and somewhere h he is also expecting that my father should give some cash in the wedding, since they have eased the burden of the wedding by buying gold. By some, I meant some decent amount of cash. At first I was okay, because my father gave gold in my sister's wedding as well, and if he is not doing so in my wedding he can give some cash to them. But their expectations are high like somewhere between 10-15 lakhs. I don't want to overburden my father related to the wedding because he needs to save for himself aswell. I am not very comfortable with so much of cash giving. And we argue a lot because of this. He is also financially over burdened, like he has already taken a loan, and for the wedding and to buy gold also he will take a loan. We both love each other a lot, like we have gone through many hurdles to reach here and convince our family. He cares for even my smallest wish. There is only one thing on which we disagree. This puts me up in a lot of confusion..sometimes I feel the place where I come from anyone will have the same demand for marriage, and compared to them they are not asking anything. Sometimes my morals tell me.this is very qeog. I am.vwry confused like what to do
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Comments (14)
Share your conflicts with your would be .. If he does not understand or he has some expectations from your parents post marriage then It's high time you take rational decision of saying bye .. Suffering is worse .. You will suffer post marriage if they have financial expectations .. So have one to one conversation with your would be .. Find his reality ...The rosy period is gone . Aab Atta daal ka bhav pata lagane ka time agaya hain 😂
So taking gold from him or his family doesn’t effect moral compass but when it come to giving money does. Just say no and spare him.
Halka Mon – Your Safe Space To Be Heard
Just say no to him and find someone are against dowry.. may be from your own caste..
Bride side cash gift to groom is normal.. prestige and status of groom family
If you both love each other then try to find a solution where you both can be happy. Money, cash, jewellery are not much important in life.
Sabji bhaaji khareedi or what in the market! What is this business transaction? Love me ye sab kahan se aa gaya. If he wants to be with u he will find a way else excuses.
Tell your husband to not give you any gold jewelry and show the loan amount to their relatives as a gift from you.
Run away.. get a court marriage.. throw a party for relatives later.. things eventually get fine with relatives as long as both parents are with you.. i feel issue here is only about showing relatives what you got.. if there is none at marriage, no need to show anything to anyone
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Being a manager if govt bank let me tell u don’t marry a banker…or else ur life is ruined🥹🥹
Just kick him out from your life . You are not a commodity People who are greedy for dowry and show their greed mentality before marriage remains the same post marriage. If you want to go through all that greed torture contuining after marriage then go get married to him . If you want peace of mind kick him out from.life. All love goes up in the air when greed of money family pressure of greed for money pops in . That guy is smart Furst buys gold from his money to show you see we purchased gold And then later asking same value of money 10 to 15 lakhs as cash recovery from you. Or around same amount . Can't you read this ? Immature educated girl blind in ❤️ Get married to someone who says before marriage not in to dowry . Who works had to earn a decent money and life together who shares bills and kids expenses 50:50 If money 💰 greed becomes The foundation of marriage before marriage that relationship is shaky on its foundation can fall like pack of cards any day . It's just matter of time beta. Post honeymoon, after having kids. Any time it can fall. Phir family court ka chakkar Lagate rehna for divorce proceedings. Gauri Khan married SRK when he was literally nothing in life and showbiz . Both build their wealth together after marriage. Today he is King Khan . You need to find such guy That's true love Not your love Which is not deep and guy says upfront need 10 to 15 lakhs aurat ka paisa to show society relatives . *** off mentality
You're so desperate to get married and if he truly loves you he'd never marry any other girl neither he'll demand dowry from you.
U def not overburden ur finances just to please the society and their family that not way to be done. This is biggest trap. U will get ruined if you overstrech more than what u can handle I would advice u to exercise caution not be bogged down by unrealistic demands try to find middle ground
Please leave him. Find some good guys in your caste, let your father find one. So that he doesn’t have to spend money, I mean this much money. One of my friend was to marry his GF in bangalore who was from north. This friend (a Telugu guy) and his sister - both marriage were supposed to happen same day, and while everything was arranged by friends side, his father asked his GF family to split the hotel cost, which this girl side was not ready to do. They had a figure - close to 5 lakh in their mind, and then finally this marriage couldn’t take place. Bit side was thinking for them to split the total bill of 20 lakh appx- in half. What do you have in your mind? 4-5 lakh?