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Comments for Post #C27126
Submit ConfessionGender: Male19 May 2026 at 3:54 pm
#C27126 "Need honest opinions" [ Marraige] I'm 34, she's 32. Perfect match on paper families aligned, roots, values, house everything matched. But reality is over 1.5 years we've barely spoken. Maybe 10-15 calls and some texts. Most of the connection has been between our families, not us directly. She moved from Rajasthan to Mumbai, wanted ultra modern lifestyle, slowly disconnected from her own family. Now at 32 she regrets some of those decisions. Emotionally she seems isolated career and money stable but relationships broken. In our limited conversations she's been rude, reactive, gets angry at simple questions, switches between emotional and cold. I've never felt natural with her. Always felt like I'm pretending. Recently had our most real conversation 1 hour call. She got angry at basic questions, called me a troublemaker, I cut the call. She called back, got emotional, opened up about her past. Families think it's perfect. My gut says something is off. But I also wonder do I even know her well enough to judge? My questions: Are these red flags or just two strangers figuring each other out? Can trauma and regret heal with the right partner? What would you do in my position?
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Comments (61)
Don't Proceed. Else, there'll be lifetime regret.
Don’t go ahead with it. The consequences may stay with you forever
Halka Mon – Your Safe Space To Be Heard
The fact that you posted this to ask someone else should be your answer
If your gutt is off then listen to your gutt .
Always trust your gut feeling also if before wedding the things are so rough just imagine with the daily routine. This phase is of love and respect which creates bond but instead she's fighting and disrespecting just say No don't think of family they aren't gonna come to save you
If your gut is confused after 18 months, imagine making a lifelong commitment and hoping clarity arrives later..
May be she gets hyper emotions wise. Sometimes hot Sometimes cold and sometimes normal. This happens when moon is weak astro wise speaking. If you gut feeling says it's not working out then decide now . Rather than meeting emotional surprises post marriage. Ask her What are her expectations from spouse marriage How you both are going to decide financial management How is your life style at home , how was her life style does it meet match somewhere ? Her nature , your nature Then decide . Again saying no two people think act react same way , but if a marriage needs to work out in the long run both needs to walk half distance of cooperating 50:50 on all issues and future unexpected issues too which will come up in future post marriage. If you feel that's not working out then decide accordingly.
Do not proceed at all, otherwise you will keep on regretting for the rest of your life.
If you were married - divorce was a straight forward solution. As you are unmarried - god has given you escape.
if you want peaceful life just cancel and find someone else.
She owns the red flag shop and painted them green. Hence, you are confused. Run as far as possible to save your life.
She would have previous relationship with someone and broke up after living with him for years and that's the reason for all this..that's my opinion
Marry only if you want to pay alimony !!
Always trust your gut feelings brother. Just end it here.
मौका है भाई, भाग जा 🙄
Yes it's a red flag, go with your gutt feeling. Trauma and regret always heal with a right person. A traumatised person suffers with confusions always unstasifed with their own self. Due to these mindset relationship suffers. .
Better give some more time for understanding before tieing
It seems like she has some past or childhood trauma that hasn't healed, and going forward it will cause you problems — end this here. For marriage, emotional and mental maturity is very essential, otherwise a person can never be happy.
You gonna regret the decision marriage the person its good you came to know the situation
Bro there is three things that I would say 1) if you think she has a childhood trauma.. ask her. Trauma has nothing to do with maturity. 2) investigate that if she has thyroid PCOD or any hormonal issues. Well I have them and that makes me over react sometimes... Even I lost control when thyroxine takes the wheel. 3) anger issue is a common thing, you can take her to a psychologist only if she Herself points it out. If you are really interested in her make a list that which kind of question is triggering her, talk to psychologist or therapist that person can guide you truly. Putting this kind of things on the internet specially anonymous post would confuse you more because there are certain type of misogynist guys moving in the comment section who will only encourage you to break alliances. But on the other hand issue find her troublesome , abusive and somewhat mentally disable you can get out of this arrangement.
Toooo old for you guys to start this relationship... Both have very rigid view and opinions , both won't compromise, adjustment to situation.. and so it's doomed
Maybe she has a past n hesitant to open up due to societal pressure n fear...u can wait n make things clear first then move ahead
Give her some space. Permanently.
Gut is usually rt but maybe better to face reality and see if decision made is liveable with or not!
Trust your gut feeling.., mostly it would help you... don't proceed this.. better try other
She is hidding something so your questions trigger her. Also if in the beginning she is like this in the future it will be worse .
Using emotional tears after committing mistakes is a long used manipulation method. Escape bro
Bhaag milkha bhaag!!
Itne bade ho gaye khud ke decision lo na agar man nahi kar raha h to tod do shadi vrna jo abhi ho raha hai shadi ke jyda hoga Better h pahle hé socho sab
Bro ur at the age of getting married but thr is no understanding between both of you mainly u hv mentioned that she's a model now do u think she'll b able to value u n ur family and her family everything changes ones the culture change so b careful r if u want her thn u better wait fr other 10years see wts the real face of her thn if she's really good enough to u go head and get ur original licence (marriage) because life is not to play game to use n throw paper so b careful and best regards and wishes 👍👍👍👍
Walk away from her ASAP and you don't need any of it. Let her heal and live her life and you don't have to do that for her. You are wasting time and efforts on the wrong person. You are more at peace alone than with her atm.
Koti kalti maar.... leave her or u will always regret
Everyone has to fix themselves. No one can save anyone. But yeah right partnership can heal both people but those people need to be aware about their behaviours and how it affects other people. Warna aag m jalove aur bache ho gye toh woh bhi jalenge sath m. She needs therapy , not marriage. You can become her friend. Meet her in person. Understand her. But bro, usse pehle shadi nahi karna. Aapki hi nahi, sabki jindagi kharab hogi
Cancel bro cancel, we need peace in life, don't bring tension
Just answering one question as I don’t have anything to comment about the whole thing. With the right partner yes trauma and regret can heal. Infact it’s the best situation to heal. A understanding mature open minded partner fosters a safe space for a person who’s undergone trauma. This safe person will be a safety net for the person who seen bad things in life but yes while you will be dealing with a lot of bad experiences yourself in the process too so unless you really love the person enough to walk down that road for a better future and help rebuild this persons life ,
Not sure why you have spent 1.5 precious years with someone whom you cannot gel with. Take a step back and end things now before it is too late Find someone who is better for you.
She's liking to be independent it seems.. doesn't want to get married.. cancel the arrangements before it's too late and proceed with some other matches
Run
Run asap
Bhai cancel krlo, she is still not over from him
Divorce hoga. I guarantee.
Run, she is going to be an emotional burden who will always tell about your mistakes. Women have such tendency, but this seems going to be a disaster in coming days, no wonder she may have some relation and all.
Bhag ja bhai time hai
While reading very 1st line itself, I wanted to ask abt the term VALUES. But where is it matched in your profile?
Ideology and un-parallel mindset... Over growing bossigem etc etc will never culminate 2 different statures of individuals... If I were to be in your position ... Without second thought or second chance ... I would have CANCELLED the proposal
Just sit with yourself in silence for 5 minutes with no distractions and reflect on if you should be marrying this person and living and dealing with her on a daily basis.
Leave it asap else that day is not far when you will have suicidal thoughts, mentally ill, sad and roam like a living dead. At that time she will leave you and will say you are not fit for me.
Go with your gut and move on, you will eventually find someone better with more matching vibes 👍
She is a boring personality or may be having reserved mindset or she is clearly not interested in you. But she thinks you should be there till she find someone worth the trouble of falling. Do not proceed, I repeat, do not proceed.
A person who doesn’t value her own family can never value others. You are not a childhood lover with baggage of memories of togetherness. Stay away. Dont try to satisfy mentally unstable people. Your whole life will be unstable after that.
She most likely had her 403 phase which broke her emotionally. Don't marry that 403
Don't proceed. You are not married, not even emotionally attached to one another. So what for are you doing so adjustment? Just for family? Not worth it.. Better look for other profiles
Don't
Move on.
Very moody person
Big red flag bro. Plz dont proceed
Big bigger biggest ---- @No #NO
Bhaag D K Bose Bhaag
Run. She is a red flag
Thats the behaviour of a used street pussy. Theres women out there that will respect you and honour you as a person.